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Song Parodies -> "Pit Your Hand 'Gainst Left Hand (of Obama)"

Original Song Title:

"Put Your Hand in the Hand (of the Man)"

Original Performer:

Lynn Anderson

Parody Song Title:

"Pit Your Hand 'Gainst Left Hand (of Obama)"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

At a rally on October 7th, the US President warned that there would be "hand-to-hand combat" if Republicans won House and Senate majorities in November's elections, after four years of Democrats' dominance. His tone was unlike that of his campaign in 2008, which I recall in the first stanza, or that of his presidency's first year, at which I hint in the second. The remainder is a "call to hands". CHFUDNKTOS.
Put right hand to left hand [1] for the man with teleprompter!
Put your land in command of the man who promised green.
Take a look at poor self and you can envy others' profligacy.
He put in that grand "Yes, we can", hid his plan to change D.C.

Put your hands on your glands for the man who thrilled Chris Matthews.
It was grand for the brand of that M.S.N.B.C.
Take a look at Fox News and you can look at Hardball differently.
Sly Keith Olberman takes left stand as he pans Sean Hannity.

Pit your hand 'gainst left hand of the man who drilled no water.
Take your stand 'gainst the man who'd command the warming sea,
Snake a hook in your wealth and "fairly" rook from brothers differently
By pittin' his band 'gainst Ayn Rand; that's the man from Hawai'i.

Pit your hand 'gainst left hand of the man who stilled foreclosure.
Take your stand 'gainst the man who commands mil-i-tar-y.
Take a look at his health plan; rue tan crook who smothers dissidently,
Because he just can't understand how this land has made us free.
I was inspired by attending the Virginia Tea Party's conference in Richmond on October 8th & 9th. [1] Applaud.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.7
How Funny: 3.6
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   4

User Comments

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Barry J. Mitchel - October 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Optional subs are "peace" for "green", " 'fat' brothers" for " from brothers" and "dissident me" for "dissidently".
Sorry, Keith. I only put one "n" in your surname; "nd" would have matched TOS.
Patrick - October 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Good rendition. Like your reference to Ayn Rand. The first chapter of "Atlas Shrugged" should be in theaters next year. Wonder if anyone will see it. Is Obama predicting combat on the floors of congress next year. "Bleeding Sumner" again. Michael Palochek noted, when I wrote a song comparing Obama to Abe Lincoln, that Obama hadn't presided over a Civil War, yet. The 1861 war was preceded by fist fights among senators and representatives. Is Obama trying to stretch the Lincoln analogy, too.
Old Man Ribber - October 11, 2010 - Report this comment
BJM - Witty and skillful as usual, but also quite thought-provoking. I hadn't heard the "hand-to-hand combat" quote. It DOES evoke Sumner/Brooks/the cane! ;D
Barry J. Mitchel - October 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Patrick: Thanks; you obviously are among the conservative cognoscenti. But you should apologize to our good friend Michael Pacholek for misspelling his surname, just as I did to Keith Olbermann.
OMR: Thanks; I hope that your provoked thoughts included BHO's overuse of executive orders, both direct and through his czars, and also recess appointments. He knows how to bypass Congress regardless of its majority.
John Barry - October 11, 2010 - Report this comment
I don't drink the Kool-Aid/tea, but I won't 1's you for that reason. 5s for good work.
Barry J. Mitchel - October 11, 2010 - Report this comment
JB: Thanks, I appreciate your candor. I was uncomfortable with "tan crook", but it fit TOS so well. Otherwise, I hope some of my points rang true with you; they obviously irritated the unobomber (I'm flattered).
Unobomber - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
BJM - I wouldn't be too flattered. I gave you 1's because I don't like you or anything you all. I never have. But if you're happy I give you 1s, then that's good for you...I'll give you plently more as long as you keep posting the garbage you call parodies.
Barry J. Mitchel - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Ub or 1b: At last, we amIwriters can stop saying that you never comment! Finally drawing you out of the shadows is a coup for me (a second 1-bomb makes me think that you're legit).
The effect of low votes is dubious anyway; most visitors search based on OS, topic or author on whom they can rely.
Barry J. Mitchel - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Breaking news -- BHO just lifted the Gulf drilling moratorium 7 weeks early. So I'll need to change "drilled no water" to "grilled no burger" (Michelle), "swilled peace lager" (beer summit), "gilded daughters" (private school), "killed the slaughter (rules of engagement) or "wilted jotters" (journalists).
Patrick - October 12, 2010 - Report this comment
I plan to invoke Michael's name again soon, and I'll try to spell it right this time. "Tan crook", I don't feel is inappropriate, since Obama's skin color is supposed to be significant to his place in history.

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