I.S.I.H.A.C.
For the best comedy
Where they often play Mornington Crescent
And when you get there, you've won,
And the game is quite fun
But no one's quite sure what they play for

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And they're going to Mornington Crescent

And it's never no trouble
When entendres are double
For you know sometimes words have two meanings
In the A to Z book there's a map of the streets
In which all of the answers are given

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And they're going to Mornington Crescent

There's a letter they tell is
From North Wales: Mrs Trellis
And she's often confused about something
Her address is germane:
Upper Sheepsbottom Lane
From the village that's called "Little Humping"

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And they're going to Mornington Crescent

And there may be some fools
Who don't know all the rules
But not Humphrey Lyttleton, the chairman
There's a chance before long,
That he'll get it all wrong
And the studio will echo with laughter

And it makes me wonder
Oooh, and it makes me wonder

If there's a question using Stovold
Don't be alarmed now
It's just a small clarification

Many conventions you can play by
Don't pick the wrong one
There'll be no time to check which round you're on

Your head is humming and you think "D'Oh!"
Because you don't know
If Hounslow East would count as boxing

So Humphrey Lyttleton (er, and Co.)
Say, do you know
The A to Z from 1952?

And as we start on EDGWARE ROAD
To DOLLIS HILL and SAVILLE ROW
GOODGE STREET is the next place to go
Countered by a spin along THE MALL
But blocking feints are not allowed
And so then HAYMARKET is barred
The play is hard, the play is fast
BAKER'S PASSAGE next to fall
Trumped by a GREEN PARK overcall

LAMBETH BRI-iDGE
and

then

MOR-or-NINGTON CRE-he-SCENT