There's a lady who's poor who remodeled her floors
But they're building the stairways uneven
And though she's spent lots of dough all the landings are bowed
It's absurd you should get what you pay for

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
They are building her stairways uneven

Malaligned down the hall well I hope she's insured
Against folks who build walls that are leaning
And the ceiling mistook so her chandelier swings
Now her home ain't a place for the living

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And they're building her stairways uneven

There's a milling about when the foreman shouts out
And she thinks there may be some deceiving
Though her budget is lean there's more cost to be seen
When her lawyer will start the proceedings

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
Cause they're building her stairways uneven

And she's figured that soon they'll say "be done by June"
But more likely will be Christmas season
And it seems she has found to that end she's bound
Cause her lawyer can't make them work faster

But it takes them longer

Should they lay carpet or use Pergo
No way would she know
If the proceedings change the whole thing

If you do the math you sympathize
This can't be undone
Bottom line, she doesn't have the funds

She needs new plumbing and she can't go because it won't flow
The pipes are falling from their steel pins
This lady can't afford a real pro, costs too much dough
Her stairway woes they are just beginning

And now she finds that her abode
It is not meeting city code
And if she doesn't get a loan
Then the city will get her home
How can anyone be so cold?
Well this story is so bizarre
And that city is such a pest
But I forgot to say the walls
Were built so bad that they would fall

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
Cause they're building her stairways uneven

Now that lady's insured for what's damaged by mold
Not the building of stairways uneven
But there's no anger she shows she still seems composed
Cause her lawyer said she'll see them in court

Cause they're building her stairways uneven