On your cell phone you're sure spellcheck is always right
But for God's sake, please turn off your spellcheck
You text things you don't mean, you don't look at the screen
With a word you can ruin my whole day
Ooh, ooh, oh for God's sake, please turn off your spellcheck

There's a post on your wall but I want to be sure
Did you mean to say pen? It came out wrong
Oh, so you broke your pen, and you forgot to check*
Sometimes all your spellchecks are misgiven
Ooh, it makes me wonder
Ooh, it makes me wonder

There's a feeling I get when I get back your texts
And my stomach is hurting from laughing
In your tweets you have said your 5-year-old lap danced
OK, maybe you meant to say tap danced*
Ooh, it makes me wonder
Ooh, it really makes me wonder

And you said if you could, you'd buy me a casket
You meant castle*? OK, not as creepy
Seems I can't ever see your Facebook status
Without my face turning red with laughter

If you use "duck" as an expletive, I'm not alarmed now
It's just a spring clean for your spellcheck
Yes you think you can use the spacebar, but in the real world
The X over the word is what works
And it makes me wonder

Your text is funny and I broke out, in case you don't know
I can't breathe because of what you said
Your cell phone has a mind of its own, and did you know
Your spellcheck thinks that you're a sick creep

Why'd you say Jews when you meant keys?*
Hilarious is hoosegow?* Please
OS is Slip n' Slide to Hell?*
I'm so mad I broke the fourth wall!!
Your smartphone's not such a smartphone
Why don't you proofread very hard
And press the little X at last?
When machines take over the world
Will they be spellchecking our speech?

(Totally awesome guitar part)

For Clapton's sake, please turn off your spellcheck.