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Song Parodies -> "Destroyed Each Chimney "

Original Song Title:

"Detroit Rock City"

Original Performer:

Kiss

Parody Song Title:

"Destroyed Each Chimney "

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

A little late (This was supposed to be up on the 31st) but this is for the Merry KISS-mas challenge! Inspired in part by John A Barry's "Glug Rye Before Christmas (A Tipple with Saint Drinksalot)"
He wasn't too bright that Christmas Eve night
Rolling Rock beer goggles cover up his eyes
He hit the bong and then he hit your roof
Wrecked Hong Kong chuggin' down all kinds of booze
There's screws loose

(Blown up!)
Irish coffee made him smash your street
(Knocked down!)
Vision's glossy sendin' nasty tweets
You're gonna lose your mind! He destroyed each chimney!

(Dead drunk!)
Whatta dummy with his reindeer fleet!
(We'll frown!)
Whatta rummy! He just thrashed your suite!

Can't fly straight, He cleaned each plate
Cookie crumbs are littered on his bright red coat
Santa stinks! Crushed my home
Hits the bar. Don't you ever wonder how he floats?!

(Threw up!)
Boots are muddy, Once my house was neat!
(Ass-clown!)
Left a puppy who just pooped and peed!

Chugs a glass, Maybe five
Smokes some weed and drunk dials his Ho, Ho, Hos
My childhood's in a nosedive
Snaps some dong pics tied up with some mistletoe
Mind's blown!

(Drains cups!)
Suit gets soggy when his egg nog leaks
(Beer's downed!)
He's so naughty when he moons his cheeks

We're in shock! We Gotta gawk!
Cops just stopped his sled, Lights flashin' right behind
Spends a wad, He'll bribe those jerks!
You'll hear him laugh cause now he's back up in the sky
Yikes!

(He's crunked!)
Things turn nutty when he hits your street

(He stunk!)
This old druggie is so hard to beat!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Below Average Dave - January 02, 2019 - Report this comment
You know, if Santa really did have to deal with checking off a list of every little brat in the world every year and then go around to each of their houses in 24 hours. . .he'd have a good excuse to be a total boozer, so I'll give him a pass:)
Agrimorfee - January 02, 2019 - Report this comment
I could picture this as an evil, off-the-bend-and-on-a-bender Kurt Russell as Santa Claus in The Christmas Chronicles movie on Netflix. Good job incorporating the rawk elements into it. 555 Ho's for you (if you got the stamina for it, ;) )!
Peter Andersson - January 02, 2019 - Report this comment
Dong pics and mistletoes - now that would be a new snapchat tradition to behold for Santa fans - but are you sure it's not supposed to be camestoes?
JAB - January 02, 2019 - Report this comment
Thanks for the shoutout, Matt. Here's one to you: 5s.
2Eagle - January 03, 2019 - Report this comment
And I thought he traveled at warp speed and had a transporter on his sleigh that he used to go down the chimney. How wrong I was.

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