Now I don't know
I don't know
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

Let me say now I don't know
I don't know
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

Greeter gives a cart to me
Prices rolled back save money
Mom n Pop store don't you try
Small business has all but died

Let me hear ya now I don't know
I don't know
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

Now my wife quickly say to me
If I buy one get one free
Everything is what they got
From fishing rods to tampons save a lot

Let me say now I don't know
I don't know
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

-- Spoken: "It's a on sale..."

Got a board so I can serf
I just found a ball that's Nerf
Here's a sweatshirt that says BUM
Got two carts full I am done

Now I don't know
I don't know
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

One more now I don't know (ah he don't know)
I don't know (he don't know, mon)
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

But I don't want to shop at JC Penny
K-Mart I refuse to go (no no no)
Don't want to shop at old Sears Robuck
Wal-Mart prices are so low (low low low)

Don't want to shop at that Maas Brothers
Burdines has nothing for me (no no no)
Don't want to shop at pricey Pier One
That yellow face just smile at me (ho ho ho)

Don't want to shop at a flea market
Don't want to place bids on eBay (no no no)
Just want to buy more Wal-Mart goodies
Prices cheap that I can pay

I don't know
I don't know
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed

Just a one more, I don't know (he don't know)
I don't know (I don't know, man)
I don't know where I'm a gonna go
If the Wal-Mart is closed!