Tried to make a call with no interference
Tried for nearly seventy days
Losing calls that I need, a screen I can't read
Wasting all the money that I have paid.
But at night I'd have these wonderful dreams
Some sort of heavenly ring
Not Verizon, T-mobile or AT&T,
But the greatest phone that you'll ever see

Cellphone in paradise
No limit on minutes, that's really nice.
Nice big buttons as shiny as ice
Just a cellphone in paradise

Heard about the old time mobile phones
They had all that radiation
You'd get a tumor the size of your head
Sooner or later you would be dead
But times have have changed for callers these days
Don't worry 'bout nuking your brain
Just sit back, relax, and do what you need
Maybe take a few a pictures and smoke some weed

Cellphone in paradise
Internet connection for no extra price.
Tech support that's really nice
Just a cellphone in paradise

I like mine with a video recorder
Holds a hundred numbers and even sorts 'em
Big color screen and great games too
Good God Almighy, what do I do for my

Cellphone in paradise
No limit on minutes, that's really nice.
Internet connection for no extra price
Just a cellphone in paradise

I need a cellphone in paradise.
I'm just a cellphone in paradise.