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Song Parodies -> "The Wreck Called the Maracanazo"

Original Song Title:

"The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"The Wreck Called the Maracanazo"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

I’ve done this song 46 times, but not at all in the last 4 years. The stadium in Rio de Janeiro is pronounced “MAHR-ah-can-NAH,” and the loss, more psychologically devastating than ever suffered by an American team, is called “MAHR-a-ca-NAH-zoh”: The Agony of Maracanã. Today, it seats 78,838. While the “final” was played on July 16, 1950, the stadium where America beat England on June 29 was named for Brazil’s independence day, June 7: Estádio Independência or Estádio Sete de Setembro. And the legend is true: The 9-year-old boy who would become Pelé told his father, a once-great player whose national team dream was cut short by his injury, and cried over the Brazil 1-2 Uruguay result on the radio, that he would win the World Cup one day, for him and for the country. And he did, 3 times. That didn't stop them from getting pounded 7-1 in the by Germany in the same stadium in the 2014 Semifinal. Brazil can host a great World Cup and can win one, just not at the same time.
The legend lives on from Ipanema on down
of the sport called O Jogo Bonito.
It's said that the game has brought plenty of fame
but the bounces of July can beat you.

It is part of the lore, two hundred thousand fans more
Than the Maracanã contained empty.
The land called Brazil had much more than their fill
But predictions of glory were early.

The ground was the pride of South America’s side
and was echoing and very spatial.
As stadiums sprawl, it was bigger than all
for a national team multi-racial.

The challenge to play came down from Jules Rimet
who had headed the cabal called FIFA.
As the Depression dawned, tournament he had spawned
made the Uruguay people believers.

The fist that did pound made a tattletale sound
slammed by Benito Mussolini.
The Italy team achieved two times the dream.
Team was great but its Duce unseemly!

The War cast its fate, tournament had to wait
when the tanks of September came crashin’.
When settled was score they could play football more
and it was off to Rio they’re dashin’.

It seems such a crime, but ‘twas England’s first time.
They said, “Lads, you can never defeat us.”
At Seven September, Americans remember
made the Three Lions say, “Damn, they beat us!”

To lose to the Yanks was predicted by cranks
and it left England feeling quite wacko.
But the headlines that blared left nobody prepared
for the wreck called the Maracanazo!

Does anyone know where the love of the game goes
when stoppage time seems to last hours?
The Brazilians were set for the prize they would get.
A draw on home soil meant champagne showers.

They faced Uruguay and they gave a great cry
but the passion soon felt like salt water.
And all that remains is the faces and the names
of the players, their sons and their daughters!

A child, Edson said, “Father, don’t shake your head.
I’ll help our country win, take forwarnin’.”
They called him Pelé, and 3 times they did play
making him most beloved of sportsmen!

And onward we go, see what Ronaldo
and Kaká and Ronaldinho did render.
Recovery grew, but the old men still knew
with the tales of July still remembered!

In 2014, Germans treated them mean
in their great now all-seater cathedral.
The bells, they have chimed, for they’ve won it five times
but as hosts, the World Cup provides peril!

The legend lives on from Ipanema on down
of the event called Maracanazo.
It's said that the game brought a terrible shame
that can't be erased by a golazo!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 1.8
How Funny: 1.8
Overall Rating: 1.8

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   8
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - July 17, 2020 - Report this comment
Sheesh, there must have been some Brazilians voting on this.
Patrick McWilliams - July 21, 2020 - Report this comment
When I was a kid, all I knew about soccer was that Latin Americans played it, and the games resulted in riots that left many people dead and injured. I much preferred baseball. "Kill the umpire!" was never meant to be taken literally. Now I drive past the old baseball field at Kensington Park (KCK) and see kids playing soccer where the infield used to be. The only game I can play these days is nostalgia.

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