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Song Parodies -> "Use Gnomes As Pins, Naturally"

Original Song Title:

"Alone Again, Naturally"

Original Performer:

Gilbert O'Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"Use Gnomes As Pins, Naturally"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Inspired by Arwen's parody "Gnomes Abound," and Ann Hammond's suggestion of a solution to the problem therein.
(instrumental opening)

In a little while, I'm told
we all should go out to bowl.
I promised myself
I'd treat myself
to a rare good set of rolls.
But I just can't compete.
Dropped big ball on my feet
in an effort to
get the ball on through
but it ends up in the gutter
leaving me to shout
nasty word that starts with "mother"!
And it gets laughs from Pip and Spaff
and Bernard, my evil brother.
But Ann has an idear
that we should try this year:
Use gnomes as pins, naturally!

To think that only yesterday
they drove Arwen away.
In an effort to
make it clear that you
shouldn't send bad vibes her way
Miss Hammond had the thought
and go with it, I think we ought.
So we'll pull 'em up
and we'll line 'em up
from the lawn onto our alley.
Now, at the line is Mike
and a strike, it seems I'm rolling.
I rolled that rock, and what a shock.
Seems now, I'm good at bowling!
And in my hour of need
the idea was good, indeed!
Use gnomes as pins, naturally!

It seems to me that there are more gnomes
resting on the lawns
just doing nothin'.
Hollow, no stuffin'.
What do they do?
What do they do?

(instrumental break)

Use gnomes as pins, naturally!

And looking back over the years
as the Amiright gang drinks beers
I remember how I cried
when my scoring died
and Bernard and Malcolm gave me sneers.
And at sixty-four years old
my father still cannot bowl.
I can't understand
how there's not one man
in the family who can do it!
Leaving me to start
feet apart and not together
but garden gnomes are my new jones.
They're making me bowl better.
And when they're knocked away
we cheer and cheer all day!
Use gnomes as pins, naturally!

Use gnomes as pins!
Yeah, I know, I've used this song too many times already. But after Ann's suggestion, well, I've learned that when a great title presents itself, and the parody lyrics start pouring out of your mind, it's best to just let it write and get out of the way.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 2.4
Overall Rating: 2.4

Total Votes: 26

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   25

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
Title of the day.
MasonR - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
You're on a roll!
Ann Hammond - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
he he
Arwen - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
=) Nicely done...and what a quick turnaround!
Yoidy - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
Great concept! Funny 5s
Michael Pacholek - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
I had a feeling people would like this one. But, Arwen, next time we go bowling, no fair using magic to knock down a seven-ten split.
alvin rhodes - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment favorite of the day
Johnny D - March 29, 2007 - Report this comment
I'll spare ya three fives.

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