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Song Parodies -> "Jamaican Bobsled Team"

Original Song Title:

"Jamaica Jerk Off"

Original Performer:

Elton John

Parody Song Title:

"Jamaican Bobsled Team"

Parody Written by:

Rex Ungericht

The Lyrics

For the Elton John Magical History Tour Challenge, I think it's time to (loosely, very loosely) document the history of the first 4-Man Jamaican Bobsled Team.
I remember very clearly
It was nineteen eighty-eight
I was looking at a TV show
That seemed to indicate

Jamaica had a bobsled team [1]
Practicing to appear
In the next Olympic games
It seemed so very weird

Come on, Jamaica
In that tropical place
How you gonna bobsled
How you gonna prep for that race

Come on Jamaica
Everybody knows
You can't bobsled in Jamaica
Cause the only snow's up your nose

So they headed up to Calgary
With their dreadlocks wound tight
And a couple kilos of ganja
Just to get them through the night

They're in it for Jamaica, yeah
And instant celebrity
Someday there will be a movie
Released by Disney [2]

Come on Jamaica
As the icicles spray
Off the sharpened runners
Of a Fisher-Price plastic sleigh

Come on Jamaica
This is getting whack
You were tokin' all that ganja
Then you got too high - on the track

[stoned bobsled riders arguing]

Come on Jamaica
It's the end of your ride
Mighta got a medal
But your sled wound up on its side [3]

Come on Jamaica
Time to leave this place
And with four more years of practice
You might finish the frikkin' race

Come on Jamaica
Even though you're not champs
Everybody loves you
And you got your own postage stamps [4]

Come on Jamaica
Now it really seems
You've inspired lots of spinoffs
Like the Swedish Bikini Team [5]

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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Peregrin - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Remember it all very well. A worthy tribute to perseverance mixed with ineptitude, Rex. Loved the snow reference thrown in there. Glad I had your lyrics to read, because I sure couldn't understand most of Reg Dwight's warblings!
Matthias - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Looks like we both did Disney themed parodies today! Well... Yours was turned into a Disney movie and mine was all about the conflict between Disney and Iwerks but ya know it still Iwerks! Really funny stuff here! Hope to see you in further rounds of the Amiright Reunion. Maybe you can join in a One Week Notice sometime too!
Stuart McArthur - May 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Very clever Rex - using the a Jamaican themed OS to describe such a comedic Jamaican moment - loved the Fischer Price ref, and all the little gags - and great rhythm and pacing too - 555
Peter Andersson - May 03, 2018 - Report this comment
How could I not love a slippery slope parody that starts off with jerk off in the title and finishes off with the Swedish Bikini Team! :-)
Rex - May 05, 2018 - Report this comment
Many thanks, Peregrin, Matthias, Stuart, and Peter!

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