In a dimly lit bedroom
Daisy wet her hair.
Warm smell of his red hat
Made it's way through the air
In the bed they were sneaking
They made love through the night
Their hearts beat heavy when Peach walked in
Yeah she walked in on their plight

There she stood looking angry
I heard her throw a shell
And Mario thought to himself,
"Why did I smoke all those mushrooms for health?"
Then he went to the castle,
it was the very next day.
Luigi was on the bedroom floor
I guess it's why they say

Welcome to the Affair Mushroom Kingdom
What a big disgrace
Mario's too late
Plenty of Toads at the Affair Mushroom Kingdom
If you're in despair, Yoshi needs you dear

His mind was totally shifted,
He got the Go-Kart and went
She hopes for no more silly, silly games, that he's playing
How they fought in the backyard,
Toad said it best
Don't drink to remember
Just drink to forget

Mario went to Bowser
'How are you old pal?'
He said,
"I haven't seen you're face in here,
since last weekend round twelve"

And still that turtle was ready to lay that day
Sobered up in the middle of the night
Now Bowser can say

Welcome to the Affair Mushroom Kingdom
Turtle loves his ways
and yeah Bowser's gay
They're messing it up at the Affair Mushroom Kingdom
What a huge surprise
Now it's time to fight

Pick sides for this evening
They will fight all day
and Peach said,
"We are all Smash Brothers here,
stuck in a Melee"
and in the Princess' chambers
They met for therapy
Talked about it with their hate aside
But they all just fought and weeped

Last thing said together
as they
Went out just once more
They tried to find the love life back
Yes, the life they lived before
'It's Fun' said Luigi
We are programmed in 3-D
We'll act happy anytime you play
but we'll turn the other cheek!