Master Vader
Why don't you take off your helmet?
Cause you might get swelled, wet
And sticky as hell
If you are sweating --
Plus, it might help you to see men
If you opt for leavin'
That thing off your head;
I know you love your image --
You're so tall and black and shiny
From the balls of your two feet up to your tip
But unless you like heat strokin'
You'd be better off to open
Up a bit

Master Vader,
Why don't you find a companion
And someday abandon
This hard, sweaty work
So get a girlfriend
Forget life as 'Master Vader'
Let go of your saber
Stop being a jerk

Don't your head get hot with your helmet on?
Oh, you're such a stiff when you carry on --
How can you tell the night time from the day?
But it seems to me some lookie
Might been laid upon a wookie
If you can find a wook that wants to play

Master Vader,
I know that you've got your reasons
Your helmet is pleasin',
But take my advice --
You needn't worry,
Cause I can give you a tissue
If that is the issue --
It cleans up real nice