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Song Parodies -> "Russian Pie"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Don McLean

Parody Song Title:

"Russian Pie"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Lada is the leading brand of car made in Russia.
A long, long time ago
I can still remember
when that fraud Trump used to make me smile.

And I knew we would have a chance
to find Barack's successor stance
and we would still be happy for a while.

But February made me shiver
New Hampshire totals were delivered.
Bad news on the TV:
They'd chosen someone sleazy.

I do remember I just sighed:
"They'll reject him, they know he's lied."
But something chilled me deep inside
the year... every... thing died.

So
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died.
This is the year that everything died."

Did you write the books of Trump?
And did he read them, that dumb-haired grump?
"Believe me," he told you so.

And do you believe in rock and roll
but Nugent and Kid Rock don't have soul
and can you tell me
why Trump's fans are real slow?

Well, I know that you're in love with him
'cause I saw you chanting in the gym.
You thought his words were true
and beat protestors black and blue!

I was a lonely midage Jersey buck
who knew Trump was a bigoted schmuck
but I knew we were out of luck
the year... every... thing died.

I started singing:
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died.
This is the year that everything died."

Now, for 8 years, Barack had our back
as once did Frank, and Bill, and Jack.
Yes, that's how it used to be.

But a Jester squared up to the Queen
with lies not exposed by John Dean
and a voice that sickened you and me.

Oh, and while the Queen was looking down
the Russians stole her hard-earned crown.
The media was adjourned:
No verdict was returned!

He's got hair worse than Richard Marx
and views older than Fenway Park
so we sang dirges in the dark
the year... every... thing died.

We were singing:
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died.
This is the year that everything died."

Gordie Howe, Muhammad Ali
Glenn Frey and Prince, David Bowie
the big names were falling fast.

Leonard Cohen and Johan Cruiff
and Leia left planetary life
and R2 and John Glenn had final blast.

Now, by half-year, we'd lost Patty Duke.
Losing Merle Haggard was no fluke.
We asked for one more dance
but George Michael didn't get a chance!

'Cause the living tried to claim the field
The Grim Reaper refused to yield.
Too many people's fates were sealed
the year... every... thing died.

We were singing:
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died.
This is the year that everything died."

Oh, and there we were, at polling place
ready to slap Trump in the face
but we would get betrayed again.

So, come on, Jack be nimble, Jack be quick.
Electoral College made us sick
'cause Putin is The Donald's only friend.

Oh, and as I watched him on the stage
his supporters seethed with bigots' rage.
No angel: Born in Hell
and he can't f***ing spell!

And as the shock climbed high into the night
to set us up for sacrificial rite
I saw Putin laughing with delight
the year... every... thing died.

He started singing:
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died.
This is the year that everything died."

I met a girl I voted for
and I asked her, "Are you really sore?"
But she just smiled and turned away.

And I went down to Carnegie
for deli food that once fed me
but the man there said the slicer wouldn't play.

And in the streets, the children gabbed
hoping nothing would get grabbed.
Upon these words, we're chokin':
Democracy is broken.

And the enemy that we feared most
replaced by terrorists, we'd boast
they burned us all like borscht on toast
the year... every... thing died.

We were singing:
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died.
This is the year that everything died."

We were singing:
Dos vedanya, Miss Russian Pie
Drove my Lada where I hadda, 'cause I hadda get by
And good old boys, they dropped their whiskey and rye
realized, "This is the year that everything died!"

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   11
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

annimal - December 28, 2016 - Report this comment
I sang
CML - December 28, 2016 - Report this comment
Not to be a Russian language transliteration Nazi, but goodbye in Russian should be rendered as "do (sounds like duh) svedanya" ..... do (until) svedanya (meeting), ie, until we meet again
Patrick - December 28, 2016 - Report this comment
Haven't seen anyone tackle this challenging OS for a long time. Very nicely done. This will be a turning point in American history. Not sure how much the Russians had to do with it. If nothing else, Trump will supply us all with parody inspiration for years to come. The number of celebrities departing ("the Grim Reaper refused to yield") seemed to be above average this year. Who thought that Fidel Castro would ever die? This is a good one, and very topical.
Pba - December 28, 2016 - Report this comment
I liked it
Jay_sherman - December 30, 2016 - Report this comment
This almost seems like a song that shuld be sung in a karaoke bar on New Years Eve. Love to see that video on youtube

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