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Song Parodies -> "Horten IX"

Original Song Title:

"Nine to Five"

Original Performer:

Dolly Parton

Parody Song Title:

"Horten IX"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Although stealth dates back to WW1 with German white doped linen Taubes invisible at 1200 ft and cellon experiments with Fokker fighters and the Linke-Hoffman R.I bomber... the real stealth studies came in WW2 and were applied by the Kriegsmarine first with stealth coatings of Opanol and Tarnmatte for the Type XXI U-boat to defeat sonar and also to shield the schnorkel from radar. The Luftwaffe then began to study stealth for their aircraft and the Ho-IX was used. It was a flying wing of wooden construction that was filled with a sawdust and charcoal filler in a resin matrix to absorb radar. Anti-radar paints were being developed to coat the leading edges of the wings along with other dielectric materials to trap radar waves or disperse them. The Ho-IX was tested at Gottingen and not picked up by radar. The US took the Ho-IX V3 back to the US for study and developed some early types of stealth paint (Ironball) as well as anti-radar grooves for aircraft fuselages, but nothing major was required unti the 1970s when the USAF tested RAM on a Windecker Eagle first and then through Intel on a Soviet book that was declassified the Lockheed "Hopeless Diamond" was projected. This involved faceting which led to the Have Blue program and then the F-117. The West Germans by 1981 had independently also come up with a stealth interceptor, the MBB Lampyridae which infuriated the USAF when they visited MBB and saw it. W Germany was pressured to drop their program but retianed the knowledge after 1989 and designed a range of stealth craft that MAY have led to sightings in 1990 at the Overberg Test Range in the RSA of two German stealth triangles- blackcraft...
Luftwaffe’s out of time and losin’ the war situation
Time to develop a new jet creation
Keep fightin’ and watch as the flying wing comes to life
Wooden fuselage and then tubular steel construction
Sawdust and charcoal as filler for some RCS reduction
Workin’ on the first stealth fighter, the awesome Horten IX

Awesome Horten IX was meant to make a killing
Got it to fly, it's tough handling and not forgiving
The Luftwaffe wants it now, but they might never even get it
It's enough to drive Goering crazy, ‘cause Hitler’s got to have it
Horten IX into service and production
You would think that Hitler would have ordered 1000
Want to move ahead, but the prototypes only amount to three
It’s not gonna win the war for Nazi Germany…

It was a nice dream that just got shattered
By 1945, series production was all that mattered
Allies won and the flying wing was taken away
Part of the spoils taken from a conquered fascist country
Building’ a stealth fighter for a war they couldn’t win
The tide never turned and the Horten IX was taken right away

Awesome Horten IX was meant to make a killing
Got it to fly, it's tough handling and not forgiving
The Luftwaffe wants it now, but they might never even get it
It's enough to drive Goering crazy, ‘cause Hitler’s got to have it
Horten IX into service and production
You would think that Hitler would have ordered 1000
Want to move ahead, but the prototypes only amount to three
It’s not gonna win the war for Nazi Germany…

Awesome Horten IX was meant to make a killing...



Ho-IX V2: http://www.century-of-flight.net/Aviation%20history/flying%20wings/images4/6.jpg In flight: http://www.nurflugel.com/Nurflugel/Horten_Nurflugels/ho_ix/ho_ix_first_flight.jpg MBB Lampyridae: http://rareaircraf1.greyfalcon.us/picturesg/la1.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Wild Child JIN - May 23, 2011 - Report this comment
Wow! from looking at all these pics, I bet that they worked "longer!" than nine to five building these planes! :-o Hope that you didn't take that long on this terrific 555 parody! :-)
Hammerhead - May 23, 2011 - Report this comment
Sounds like an awesome freakin'plane!!!
Rob Arndt - May 23, 2011 - Report this comment
In March 1945 Goering ordered the Horten brothers to start construction on a new Amerika bomber- the Ho-XVIII. By May 1945 work on the tubular steel center section was under way...

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