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Song Parodies -> "Empty Biro"

Original Song Title:

"Jocko Homo"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Empty Biro"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

When you pen doesn't work, it's kind of annoying. When you've got, like, sixteen boxes of pens that are all dead, it starts getting a bit silly. Not that that matters in a parody, of course. Enjoy!
When writing crap
It never fails
Whether it's notes
Or sending mail
I'm still involved
In mail termed "snail"
Would, but my pen
Is running low
Damn empty pen

I shake it 'round
The ink won't flow
And that sucks balls
Empty biro
You stupid pen
Why won't you flow?
Such a useless
Dumped in the bin
Empty biro

Got a spare box
Pens red and blue
Pick a replacement
This one's dead too?
Another pen
Where the ink's low
One more worthless
Third time's the trick
I sure hope so
Dead? Not again

More pens now, blue, red, black
And each one's as dead as a dead thing
Simile lacks?
Too focused on trying
To find a pen that's great, so far, ain't great
I can't do what I want to do
Write a plan
For the next crime I plan to do

Is this some big practical joke?
Switch my pens with ones that are broke
So I can't write a single stroke
And so my crime goes up in smoke
Paper's still white, makes me feel low
These pens are shite, the ink won't flow
Look 'round my house, there's a no-show
Of pencils, now that's a big load
But there's a lot of dead biros
Both mine and not, their ink is low
And though I may be saying "low"
So one might say that there's still hope
But believe me, when pens are low
They are empty, and that's a load
There may be ink, but it won't flow
Sometimes I think pens hate me so

Just work for me, B-I-R-Os
I need ink, please, B-I-R-Os
For my crime spree, B-I-R-Os
So work with me, B-I-R-Os
Why so empty, B-I-R-Os?
You're all empty B-I-R-Os
No plans for me, B-I-R-Os
I just bought these two days ago!

Anyone have a clue what time signature this song is in? It sounds like both 3/4 and 4/4 at the same time, it's really weird. Imagine that, Devo being weird, never woulda guessed.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Agrimorfee - October 21, 2014 - Report this comment
7/8 per wiki, TCOP. What version of this did you write this from? It doesn't match the words with my own "They're Il Divo!"
Agrimorfee - October 21, 2014 - Report this comment
7/8 per wiki, TCOP. What version of this did you write this from? The second half does not match pace with my own "They're Il Divo!"
bobpiecheese - October 21, 2014 - Report this comment
This 2001 remaster: Although as far as I can tell, they only differ in the very last line. Maybe it's the different layout? Also, I must commend Weird Al for translating 7/8 into common time for his polka version of this song('s first ten lines).

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