I must pour me a flagon of a bubbly brew
Don't wanna drink no cans of that Mountainy Dew
Kaka would taste as greenishly good
Fresca's little hostile
Swill a couple bottles of Doctor "Prune"

Pepsis, Cokes, RC's
Let's hear it for the triple-y of brownish colas
Pepsis, Cokes, RC's
When drink is right all the head should fizzle 'round
With carbonate-y sound

Puked on Nehi, it's not the real deal
Crave Diet Rite? Have it with a bad meal!
Sprite's come and been, so has Seven Up
Soda's on the West Coast
And Pop is what ya call it in a midwestern pub

Pepsis, Cokes, RC's
Let's hear it for the triple-y of brownish colas
Pepsis, Cokes, RC's
When drink is right all the head should fizzle 'round
With carbonate-y sound

I never liked coolin' with a draught Root Beer
Or a Cream Soda pale
Drink up Fanta, then I blow orange bubbles
There's no value seen in Ginger Ale, uh huh
No value seen in Ginger Ale, uh huh

So just pour me a flagon of a bubbly brew
As longa it's a tops three mahogany hue
Cal'rie few - that watery Tab
Schweppes' a little uncool
Swill a couple bottles of Mister Pibb

Pepsis, Cokes, RC's
Let's hear it for the triple-y of brownish colas
Pepsis, Cokes, RC's
When drink is right all the head should fizzle 'round
With carbonate-y sound

(repeat and fade)