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Song Parodies -> "Missing My Twinkies"

Original Song Title:

"More Than A Feeling"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Missing My Twinkies"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

"There's a box of Twinkies in that grocery store. Not just any box of Twinkies, the last box of Twinkies that anyone will enjoy in the whole universe. Believe it or not, Twinkies have an expiration date. Some day very soon, Life's little Twinkie gauge is gonna go... empty." - Tallahassee, Zombieland
I heard the news warning that Hostess is gone
But how could they do this? It’s not okay!
Now on the shelves but won’t last too long
Dude, you will die if you touch my cakes!

I’m missing my Twinkies!
Missing my Twinkies!
I must grab the last box they’ll ever make
Poor little Twinkies!

News left me shrieking!
Score me a Twinkie!
Could this be the last of cream filling?
Stuck with those off-brands is bone chilling!

Under the steeple we pray to God
That our treats stay fatty and deep fried
My gut isn’t small of pastries I’m fond
I weight half a ton, This news made me cry!!!

I’m missing my Twinkies!
SnoBalls and Twinkies!
It’s my fear that Ding-Dongs will go away
Also those Twinkies!

My sex life was kinky
It involved Twinkies
But that nightly plan’s been replaced
At least my Little Debbie’s here to stay!

Once was wired from eating loads
But now I’m pathetic in bed I stay
That cream was the pearl in yellow foam
My sugar high has now crashed today
It crashed today!!!

Oh, No!!!

Bid adieu to Twinkies!
So long to Twinkies!
All those I hogged now I might lose weight
Missing my Twinkies!

Soon slim and dinky
Without my Twinkies!
For them I’ll spend my cash on eBay

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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Glen S - November 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Well stated Matt. And well done. Especially liked 'News left me shrieking'. NPR was confident someone would pick up the brand. Its already sold tens of millions this year alone.
Callmelennie - November 20, 2012 - Report this comment
You've finally matched an OS I know to a topic that I understand, Mathias, so I can now render a verdict on your parody. So here's 3 Fives. That and ninety nine cents will get you a package of Twinkies .. And despair not, for the latest news is that this dispute is now going to mediation under the auspices of the NRLB and the NDEA (National Diabetes Encouragement Association)
AFW - November 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Never been a Twinkie fan..but you describe the dilemma very well..
Agrimorfee - November 20, 2012 - Report this comment
I am pretty partial to their Cherry Pies & Apple Pies, and the Glazed Honeybuns. Word on the street Bimbo Bakery based out of Mexico (I kid you not) is interested in taking over the brands. Good job, Matthias, especially for making this current topic stay as potentially fresh as a Twinkie! (Favorite line: "That cream was the pearl in yellow foam"!
Meriadoc - November 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Oh dear - the second Twinkie song of the day rendering them as sexual aids. What is this sight coming to? ;)
bobpiecheese - December 09, 2012 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Even though Hostess has never sold their products in my country (or at least in South Australia), I can see how the loss of something so (apparently) tasty can drive one to despair. I know I'd go nuts if Farmers Union collapsed and stopped selling their Iced Coffee. 555!
Rex - December 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Topical and funny. I guess you'll just have to bake a yellow cake and inject it with a mixture of sugar and lard.
Below Average Dave - December 13, 2012 - Report this comment
All of their major products will be sold to other companies and continue to exist. I can't say I've really noticed the loss of Hostess even though I used to love Twinkies, my waistline didn't. . .Good overall:)
Blaydeman - December 13, 2012 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Very current topic choice Matty and let me say I'm always a fan of taking current event and amplifying them to a crazy level. I'm not a big fan of Twinkies myself. However, they are my favorite yellow cake, second only to uranium. (chuckle, chuckle) But serious, funny stuff. I enjoyed the Twinkie sex line.

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