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Song Parodies -> "Troll Fears the Bleacher"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Fear the Reaper"

Original Performer:

Blue Oyster Cult

Parody Song Title:

"Troll Fears the Bleacher"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Her hair is bleached blonde;
his “hair” must be donned.
Screecher does fear the bleacher,
although she’s from a friendly domain
(she’s instilling terror).
But he’s fraidy,
(Troll fears the bleacher)
way gambogian
(Troll fears the bleacher).
He’s afraid he’ll cry,
(Troll fears the bleacher)
’fraid to take a stand
Wah, wah. . . .

Just her job she done;
the questions weren’t fun
Don’t he know he’s doomed to get
questions that are not softball-fluffy?
Don’t he know he’s sure to get
some hard questions that he can’t just wave away?
So he’ll go and scoot from “threat.”
such a pussy that he’s gonna stay away,
decline debating fest.
And this represents leadership strength? OK?????
(She’s instilling terror)
Scared o’ lady,
(Troll fears the bleacher)
scared like girly-man.
(Troll fears the bleacher)
He don’t wanna cry,
show he’s a weeper.
Dames like that. . .can’t stand!
Wah, wah. . . .

She’s the “unfair” one,
so he’s gonna run.
On the night of one gabfest,
he got petulant when she pressed on.
Later his trap opened for a nasty smear
that’s nothing more than a bully’s jeer.
That’s what bullies do, ’cause they’re in fear,
claiming, “I’m not afraid!”
’fraid o’ lady,
compensates with jeer.
Dampen, his eye rims
but in public, can’t cry.
He looks backward, like fearful guys
who live each day in terror
that we will understand
they are living in terror.
’fraid and quaking,
trolls cheer their “preacher.”

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.3
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.3

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   1
 3   1
 4   1
 5   2

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