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Song Parodies -> "The Great Pretender"

Original Song Title:

"The Entertainer"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"The Great Pretender"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

The irony is, the Platters' "The Great Pretender" has only 3 verses, and I have to fill 7 (or 6, if you repeat the 1st) -- so it might make sense to cut this one down to a time of 3:05. To fight that, I also included references to Jackson Browne's song "The Pretender."
(instrumental opening)

I am the Great Pretender
and I know just where I stand.
Of all of my emotions
I seem to be in command.
Pretending what I'm doing
is that I'm doing well.
But you know the game
you'll see through the shame.
My need is such
I pretend too much.
I'm lonely, and you can tell.
Oh, whoa.

I am the Great Pretender
and I've had to pay my price.
A woman I went out with once
I now am missing twice.
Aw, but still she comes to haunt me.
in the shade of an old freeway.
So I'll rent a house
and I'll feel like a louse
and I'll miss her a bunch
as I pack my lunch
and go to work each day.
Oh, whoa.

I am the Great Pretender
adrift in my own world.
Imagining the palaces
where I would dance with girls.
I can't remember faces
but I still play the game.
Aw, but with her scheme
I'm alone to dream.
And after a while
with my phony smile
it's to my real shame.

I am the Great Pretender
aware of time gone by.
My friends have tried to tell me
it's just wink of an eye.
Aw, this feeling, make-believing
but it now feels too real.
And the sirens sing
and the church bells ring
and I run through the night
with all of my might
from something my heart can't conceal!

I am the Great Pretender.
I come to do my show.
I've got a flabby body
and a face made for radio.
Aw, it took me years to get where
I'm laughing like a clown.
We had a beautiful song
but our love went wrong
so I seem to be
what I'm not you see
and I pretend she's still around!

I am the Great Pretender.
The actor of my age.
I act like I get honeys
upon my made-up stage.
I'm going try to find me
a girl who knows what laughter means.
But if you are there
say for us a prayer
so that through the din
we'll fill the colors in
for our paint-by-number dreams!

I am the Great Pretender!
And I know just where I stand!
Of all of my emotions
I seem to be in command!
Pretending what I'm doing
is that I'm doing well!
But you know the game!
You'll see through the shame!
My need is such
I pretend too much!
I'm lonely, and you can tell!

(instrumental close)

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.3
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.3

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   5
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jonathan - August 10, 2015 - Report this comment
they told me to cut my score down to 305 but screw it I'm giving 555 anyway!
Patrick - August 10, 2015 - Report this comment
Two great autobiographical songs about the music business. Never realized until now just how similar the stories are. You used "The Entertainer" several years ago as a political number. I still remember it. A classic "smoosh".
Patrick - August 12, 2015 - Report this comment
I never use the numerical rating system. Only pay attention to what someone says who isn't afraid to use his own recognized name. This was a very impressive mesh of two songs with similar themes. I've often noticed that artists are at their best when singing about the joys and hardships of a musical career.

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