It’s September in the Capitol,
As Congress returns from recess.
And we Democrats promptly prepare
To exploit electoral success.

My party chairs all of the House committees.
We control where the spending goes.
And it gives us all chills to dream of passing bills
That override Bush’s vetoes.

La la la de de da
La la de de da da da

Approve my earmark, San Francisco Nan,
Approve it if you will.
‘Cause my district’s in need of a subsidy
Attached to the next spending bill.

Now John from Detroit is a liberal
And unions fund his campaigns
So he’s quick with a vote to help float labor’s boat,
Which sends Ford and GM down the drain.

He says, “Nancy, big business is killing me
So we’ve got to show off our new clout.
Well, I’m sure that they would be appreciative
Of a trillion dollar bail out.”

Oh La la la de de da
La la de de da da da

Now Brad is an Evansville congressman
Who wants big bucks spent in his town.
And he’s talking with Steny, who knows there aren’t many
Earmarks that the House will turn down.

And we want you to pay more income taxes.
If you must, please take out a big loan.
Yes, we’re spending your money on arrogance,
But it’s better than spending our own.

Approve my earmark, San Francisco Nan,
Show my district some love.
Because Congressional superfluity
Is something that I am proud of.

Though we shouldn’t gloat over our victories,
I just cannot suppress my big smiles
At the things we finance, such as studies of ants
And analyses of the X-Files.

And San Francisco is the place that I call home,
So I’ll fund a few projects there
The Golden Gate Ferry, a big feng shui dairy,
And my statue in Washington Square.

Oh La la la de de da
La la de de da da da

Approve our earmarks, San Francisco Nan,
Approve them all today.
Yes, we’re all in the mood for a spending spree
‘Cause we’re not the ones who will pay.