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Song Parodies -> "The Hose"

Original Song Title:

"The Rose"

Original Performer:

Bette Midler

Parody Song Title:

"The Hose"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I know there are a couple of other parodies out there with the same title, but this is different.This is quite possibly the dirtiest parody I have ever written...............;)
Some say knob, and some say wiener, all types some short some long.
Some say dick, and some say peter, some laugh when they say dong.
It needs some love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need.
Need to find a pretty flower, so it can spill it's seed.

By yourself, or with a loved one, always fun to watch it dance.
Sitting there all cocked and ready, won't you give it a chance?
Make it stand up at attention, with just a simple tease.
Soldier of love all primed and ready, don't make me beg on my knees.

When the night has been too lonely,
and the day has been too long,
Even if you're old or homely, you can always enjoy your schlong,
Just remember to get some tissues, play to hard it's going to blow,
Spilled the seed, there in the bathroom, It's your thing some call
The hose.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   2
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Arwen - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
But I'm sure it will inspire more and more dirty works as the days go by, Cookie! 5s!
Sugar - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
very made me feel tingely all over and even blush a little.
Cookie-man - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
OK! First of all if you are going to drop 1's have the balls to leave a comment!!!! Now I'll get off my soap box. Thanks you so much Arwen for your vote. You know what they say...... dirty minds think alike! And let me hear you say ssssshhhhhhhshuga!!! I'm glad I could make you tingle sugar! ;)
Johnny D - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
And yet another 5 today on the Peter-Parody-Peter-Meter!
Cookie-man - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny, Thanks for whipping out your peter meter to rate my schlong er I mean song..........LMAO!
Meriadoc - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Heh heh .. he said 'tissues'...heh heh.
Michael Pacholek - July 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Merry and Pip did this one much, much better. Don't ask me how they were able to, because you don't wanna know... and I'm not sure I do.
Cookie-man - July 05, 2004 - Report this comment
LOL! Thanks Meriadoc! ;)
Ashkicksass - July 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Well I loved it! And whoever gave you ones is a dick!
Cookie-man - July 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Ash! I think so to and I would write them a dirty letter if I could remember where my pen is. LMAO!

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