My father is a farmer
A frugality man
My mother she had married him
Down in Birmingham
And they've never seen no jerry cans
Nor applied power saws
And their idea of technology's
A half moon toilet door

Life's crappiness was painful
There was darkness all around
Such bummers were those oil lamps
For when the sun went down
There were no hi-fi systems
Or Hydro-Lectric dams
And no frequency, to choose it
'Cause we're pre-electric man

I walked around in wrinkled shirts
No power irons here
And the farm was big and icy cold
In winter hard to bear
It's a future bought with tallow
'Cus those candlesticks were cheap
And they must make do with great big awkward
Shears for shearing sheep

And my father visionized for me
To follow his caprice
Had a dented crank Victrola
Upon the mantelpiece
My parents weren't adventurers
Into electric-land
They will never blow a fuse - it's
Not for pre-electric man

Well no juicer and no percolat-
er - kitchen's quite austere
No Silex or no Proctor
Nor no swivel massage chair
Prohibited are motors
Time we fritter 'way by hand
No microwave - can't use it
'Cus we're pre-electric man

My father's ways are funny
And I must break free and fast
He is sure so set and quirky
It's a big pain in the ass
Yes I must spurn electrophobey
And decline we shouldn't glow
First kill cheap rooted platitudes
And money I'm gonna blow

Buy 'ppliances all varied
And arrange 'em round my bed
And have visions of extension cords
All looped inside my head
My mettle might perturb ya
But my shrink does understand
'Cus this life I did not choose it
As a pre-electric man

Oh - oh and the pre-electric man....
Oh the positive and the negative of the pre-electric man

(repeat and fade)