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Song Parodies -> "Pre-election Plan"

Original Song Title:

"The Free Electric Band"

Original Performer:

Albert Hammond

Parody Song Title:

"Pre-election Plan"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

This is M&P’s first (and last) word on the whole blasted subject. Original song on YouTube

Their banter is a crock, sir
Like a Tammany sham
Their pother lacks for verity
Tho’ cleverly planned
They’re both routine embarrassments
Who preside over blah
And they morph with much rapidity
If their views purport to flaw

Their campaign costs were paid for
By the shady and the clowns
Some bumbler in the Gov’nor manse
Or wanker in White House
Sly dudes, they are insistent
When talkin’ ‘bout schemes, grand
So, if politics was music
Wouldn’t go to see that band...

They’re lent the tool of right-winged blurts
Or leftly-goaded snare
Whether mule they be or elephants
They’re filled with heated air
And they preach of God and values
Or they’re secularly ‘deep’
And they sniped on air of any vile
Sh*t that they could heap

With our future euthanized we see
A barrage of deceit
While lament to only mourn ya:
Our nation in defeat
The errant and con-posturers
In candidatal-land
Wily give us up and schmooze us
With their pre-election plan

Well, Republicans and Democrats
Put on fair share of smear
Reality gets doctored
They’re uncivil; insincere
Trust no-one: truth is slaughtered
“Put us in the promised land”
Sure tired of their musings
And their pre-election plan

I can’t help think it funny:
Malcontent is growing fast
That those candidates, all turkeys
Are a giant pain in ass
Rhetoric spurn: I think it’s gaudy
Not inclined to crap, bestowed
Those sycophantic platitudes
And hollow bullsh*t do show

They’d court with us, then marry
And would rush us then to bed
But they’ve screwed me well enough by now
By f***ing with my head
Their mettle should perturb ya
Us belittled, us be damned
Novem’: Dem or Rep: we’re losing
Waste of pre-election plan!

No-ooo! The pre-election plan... (repeat and fade, hopefully)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   5

User Comments

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Patrick - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
One of the great original songs that gets very little use here, perhaps too obscure. I last heard on radio in 1975. This is a very cleverly worded parody, do I detect some Britishisms? Like the like "bumbler in the gov'nor manse or wanker in White House". Some good matches to the original lyrics as well. "Routine embarrassments who preside over blah" is outstanding. I figure the political rhetoric will start heating up soon on this site, this is certainly one of the best.
Rick C - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
I totally agree! Can't wait for all the BS hype to end!
AFW - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
Definitely sums up the situation..and I don't mean the high hair guy on Jersey Shore..
Schadenfreude for 2008 - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
That's what you get for hating Bush... That's what you get for hating Bush... Usurper Zero Boy has kicked you in the tush! That's what you get for hating Bush.
Meriadoc - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone! I apologize for not being around the last week, but I've been pretty sick with the flu. Will try to catch up on the last few days of voting when I am feeling a bit better. :)

Sf2008: Where did you get the idea we hated Bush? It certainly didn't say so in the parody.
Meriadoc - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
@Patrick. I loved the OS from the first time I ever heard it in '73. Albert Hammond was highly under-rated. I see you checked out our other version of the OS in '08 :)

As for the Britishness, one was a rough 'postrophe and the other was me channeling Pippin! ;)
Tommy Turtle - October 02, 2012 - Report this comment
Super props for the Tammany Hall ref, and a painful truth in "While lament to only mourn ya: / Our nation in defeat."   :(
Another DKTOS, as usual (sigh), but full of both good lines and bad truths. 555, and spend it quickly ....

The usual no-obligation (hope the flu flew, btw), but the sentiments are truly shared -- this registered Libertarian doesn't care for either party.

"My Disfavored Things (U.S. Left / Right Wings)"
  which inspired more than 8,000 words of reader comments. (Of course, 6,000 of those were TT's replies, but still ... ;)

Followed up on the next posting day with
"'Both Sides Now (US Left- And Right-Wing Follow-Up)", an equal-opportunity bashing of both Bush and Obama.
  The first comment there, by John Barry, said it all, in three words.
Peregrin - October 03, 2012 - Report this comment
And so we are all understanding of this half of the duo's views - I don't give a fig, a tinker's cuss or a rat's arse for any of them. Neither for the ones in my country.

Politics may have been a good idea when the Greeks originally came up with the concept, but it's sure gone down the S-bend since then.
Meriadoc - October 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Tommy: Tammany just came to me in a flash of inspired brilliance while trying to rhyme family. It was just one of those things I'd picked up from osmosis and I must admit I was rather foggy on it, just associating it with SHADY POLITICS. I wiki'ed it to make sure it fit.

I must admit, this half of the duo doesn't give a fig etc. either. I just want the election to be over so I don't have to hear any more about it for four years. Any political opinions I have are based on common sense and common decency and both naturally transcend either political party. I don't even pretend to be informed. Like Dylan, I just wanted to make the words rhyme - ha ha.

BTW Tommy, did you like the OS? It was an absolute favorite of mine back in the day.
Bill Klein - October 05, 2012 - Report this comment
A funny and intelligent reworking of an underappreciated tune. Agree with the sentiment as well.
Meriadoc - October 05, 2012 - Report this comment
Thank you so much Bill - appreciate your comment and always glad to hear from someone that remembers the OS.
wandlimb - October 07, 2012 - Report this comment
The polls will soon be black and dead, and where the voter raised his head, will be a hanging chad instead.
Meriadoc - October 07, 2012 - Report this comment
@wandlimb: Ha ha! Great parody of a line that no one but myself and Pippin will recognize. Thanks for the chuckle.
Peregrin - October 08, 2012 - Report this comment
"Why do voters weep?" said he
Because they're lied to constantly
With distaste - all comes back to me
Frowns are delivered...
Tommy Turtle - October 09, 2012 - Report this comment
(as in the old Westerns, "Smile when you say that, Mister", said with a huge, friendly grin:)
Merry, exactly what part of "DKTOS" was not clear to you? ;-D ... wow, that must have been one *really* bad case of flu. (gracefully leaves Merry an out.)

More bad news, Merry: "I don't have to hear any more about it for four years." Ummm, do you remember that the campaign for 2008 POTUS *nomination* started very early in 2007 (January, IIRC), barely after the 2006 mid-term winners took office?
Refresher: H. Clinton was the presumptive nominee, and in another one of those "choose your words with taste; you might have to eat them" moments, one reporter announced that "This won't be a nomination; it'll be a coronation!" (of Queen Hillary). Which means that they'll start talking about the 2014 mid-term elections as soon as the winners take their oaths in January.
  (Don't shoot the messenger! ;)

And now for the good news: The Tammany Hall crowd lost the election for Mayor of NYC to reformer Fiorello H. LaGuardia (although one must admit that naming the candidate after an airport was a cheap, slimy way to get fast "voter recognition"). If you've not heard the album from the B'way musical, it's a must.
  Clever rhymes, funny puns, nimble neologisms -- the influence on the young Turtlet is noted on the Intro page to selected lyrics from the musical. Pa Turtle had a huge collection of B'way albums. Intro: (same site that has the TT Pacing Tips; just click the individual "Fiorello!" song links at the top of the page)
"Little Tin Box" (grafters being grilled for indictment) says it all -- and that sadly, nothing has changed since then. (Also, The_Funniest_Echo_Line_*Ever* -- don't miss it!)

Back to our current mess: Try Libertarianism is chock full of common sense and common decency. It would be great if they could occupy those buildings Down By The (Potomac) River.

(I cheated. You guys have never heard of search engines, eh? ;) psst -- use They don't invade your privacy like the big G, which does *not* stand for "goodness".)

Only Albert Hammond song TT has ever parodied was "Rain/S. California", and naturally (being TT) it became:
  "There's Intercourse In Southern Pennsylvania" --- which is, of "-course", a true statement, along with a number of other delicious double-entendre towns in Penn.
Meriadoc - October 09, 2012 - Report this comment
Toooooommmmmmyyyy! DKTOS should not come into play, as we provided a link, and you were supposed to go listen to it... (and then thank us for introducing you to one of the coolest pop tunes of the 70s). If you tool about YouTube a bit you can also find Down By the River, which (although very hokey), is also a pretty cool song.

Politics - I don't wanna hear another word about it...

I check out yours if you'll check out ours:

It was a very early effort, but I still kinda like it.
TT - October 09, 2012 - Report this comment
Merry, TT kinda' fell off the musical planet around 1970 or so, and with rare exceptions, finds most later stuff actually painful to the ears. (Do turtles have ears? Guess they do now, lol!). Tried it on your (Pip's) previous "recommendation", and got macabre scenes of death and crucifixion along with a very non-musical voice. .... Will read your AH parody (ponders whether to rephrase that), as I do like that tune.

"I check out yours if you'll check out ours:" .... sounds vaguely familiar -- when I was six, I think I said that to the six-year-old girl next door ..... ;-D
Meriadoc - October 09, 2012 - Report this comment
Funny, I climbed ON the musical planet in 1970.

I promise - no death and crucifixion in any Albert Hammond tunes. Just silly lip-syncing surrounded by long haired teens.

I intended it to sound that way.... ;)
De Gustibus Non Disputandum Est - October 10, 2012 - Report this comment
Re: last line of each's: Isn't it nice, as you've said before, to have a reader that you know will always get it? :) :) :)

I tried the YT vid. The best part was the long-haired teen girls. xD   IMHO, his voice was much more pleasant in "Never Rains", and just played that one at YT also, to make sure it wasn't just the tinny laptop speakers vs. original radio play.

Unfortunate about the generation gap or whatever. Your Humble Servant bemoaned that site-wide problem in a parody entitled simply "DKTOS", which you kindly v/c'd 2 1/2 years ago, but it made the point -- missed by 2E, alas -- that some readers find some writers' OSs unpleasant to hear. Refresher?

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