I had a team, so good it seemed,
A-Rod could cope with anything.
But they always blundered in the playoff race.
They don't have a future, even triple A.
I used to own the Rangers,
They seemed good in every way to me.
I had to sell the Rangers
When the Texans went to vote for me.
All Texas screams, "They aren't a team!"

I had a team, a fantasy.
I couldn't face reality.
And my ruminations were heard across the state.
After the election, my future couldn't wait!
The Yankees beat the Rangers,
Nothing good in how the fellas played.
They're so bad, the Rangers,
I knew the sale would make them pay.
From Austin's gleam, I dissed my team.
I'll say one thing, can't miss my team.

I had a dream, so great, it seemed.
To move ahead my Rangers team.
They made many blunders, lost their playoff games.
They choked in every season, every year the same!
The Yankees beat the Rangers,
Every game but one they whipped our tails.
I believe the Rangers
Really ought to spend some time in jail!
They impersonate a baseball team.
My hands are clean, I sold my team!