Song Parodies -> If I Were a Santa
| Original Song Title: | "If I Were a Rich Man" |
| Original Performer: | Zero Mostel |
| Parody Song Title: | "If I Were a Santa" |
| Parody Written by: | Rex Ungericht |
Song #8 of "The 12 Parodies of Christmas".
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
If I were a holly jolly man, if I were a frayleich man
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would dress up for my yearly flight in a Yarmulkeh that's red and white
And I would
Have my elves keep busy the whole year working on every kosher toy
Wooden dreidels for ev-er-y girl and boy
And I would
Have my reindeer practice their flying faster and higher than before
I would kvel as I would watch them soar
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would greet you "sholem aleycham", if I were a Christmas man
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would thrill both shikse and shygetz, and I'd never have any regrets
And I would
Schlep a bag jammed full of the presents I would deliver Christmas eve
Landing on the rooftops with great espirit
And then a
Quick trip down the chimney to drop off gifts for the little goyem kids
And maybe nosh a schmear left near the tree
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would get a lot of mazel tov, if I were the Christmas mensch
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
But I'll never serve as you-know-who, because I'm orthodox and I'm a jew.
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
If I were a holly jolly man, if I were a frayleich man
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would dress up for my yearly flight in a Yarmulkeh that's red and white
And I would
Have my elves keep busy the whole year working on every kosher toy
Wooden dreidels for ev-er-y girl and boy
And I would
Have my reindeer practice their flying faster and higher than before
I would kvel as I would watch them soar
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would greet you "sholem aleycham", if I were a Christmas man
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would thrill both shikse and shygetz, and I'd never have any regrets
And I would
Schlep a bag jammed full of the presents I would deliver Christmas eve
Landing on the rooftops with great espirit
And then a
Quick trip down the chimney to drop off gifts for the little goyem kids
And maybe nosh a schmear left near the tree
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
I would get a lot of mazel tov, if I were the Christmas mensch
If I were a Santa,
Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle ho ho ho
But I'll never serve as you-know-who, because I'm orthodox and I'm a jew.
Copyright 2005 Rex Ungericht. All rights reserved.
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User Comments Follow...
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Oy, oy, oy Merry Christmas!
Je-wish you a merry Christmas, Rex! 555
With tradition you mess? Oh well. But shouldn't those "daidel deedles" have included a dreidel?
Adding a good Christmas flavor to a Broadway favorite..good work..fives
Schlep these fives home.
didn't get all the Jewish gags, Rex, but a good read anyway - 555
Mazel tov to all. Stuart - this is the first time I've attempted something like this - I hope the online Yiddish dictionary I used was accurate!
Yes I had to have someone translate some of this but even tho...this was pretty funny
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