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Song Parodies -> "Rationing Motherhood Week"

Original Song Title:

"National Brotherhood Week"

Original Performer:

Tom Lehrer

Parody Song Title:

"Rationing Motherhood Week"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

The ruling from HHS that Catholic charities, or at least their insurers, must cover contraception and sterilization services met push-back from the bishops and others. Concurrently, family and social values issues became prominent in the Republican debates and the US media. If one week were dedicated annually for such controversy, TOS might be the inspiration for an appropriate theme song. Warning: very realistic language may offend squeamish readers.
Oh, the pro-choice hate the pro-life
And the pro-life hate the pro-choice.
The fate of some with no voice [1]
Is on coldest slab, wished cool.

But during Rationing Motherhood Week,
Bashful young mothers can't speak;
Newly born by doctors dark
Are lanced from cheek to cheek, [2]
Then stunned to euthanize
Defectives you don't prize. [3]
It's wrong if you just let 'em grin and drool.

Oh, some poor folks grow to rich folks.
Many rich folks once were poor folks.
All the right folks date all assured folks. [4]
It's American as Apple i-.

But during Rationing Motherhood Week,
Trashing house-mothers is chic.
Blue "Borkers" shove "constructive" judges
'Cause they Harry pique. [5]
Cough up that hundred grand
For each kid who's not planned;
Dues at college lately drift too high.

Oh, Sebelius baits the Catholics,
So the Catholics gate Sibelius.
Health insurers rate the mandates
And "Main-Stream Media" grates Fox News.

But during Rationing Motherhood Week,
Cash for non-mothers could peak.
It's rational! Everyone smile as
Unmanned mothers stay sleek.
Think twice 'bout people who
Act superior to you. [6]
They total power seek, so has grown fear;
Be grateful if they're outward cast this year!
[1] The unborn
[2] Actually ear to ear in "partial birth" late-term abortion
[3] Illinois Senator Barack Obama voted to authorize the killing of any abortion survivor, to fulfill the woman's intent.
[4] A recent study revealed that upper-class couples are most likely to wed and raise traditional families.
[5] Refers to Senate denial of consent for Robert Bork and blocking of more recent judicial nominees by Harry Reid.
[6] The statists currently in the executive branch who bypass Congress and the people

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 3.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Barry J. Mitchel - February 28, 2012 - Report this comment
I'd change "doctors dark" to "surgeons stark" to fit TOS and the actors better.
Barry J. Mitchel - February 28, 2012 - Report this comment
Oops! I misspelled "Sebelius" the second time; meant Kathleen not Jean.

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