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Song Parodies -> "She's Not Available"

Original Song Title:

"It's Not Unusual"

Original Performer:

Tom Jones

Parody Song Title:

"She's Not Available"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Tom Jones is from Wales. As is the unrelated subject of the first verse. For the record: I hope her elderly husband makes a full recovery. I want her to be happy. I'd prefer it if she were happy with me, but it's time to move on. The other six women cited in this song aren't returning my calls either.
(instrumental opening)

She's not available, she is loved by other one.
She's not available, she has fun with other one.
But when I see my Catherine with that other one
it's not unusual to see my cry, I wanna die.

She's not available, she's wed to Marc Anthony.
She married him even though his history
shows he weds gorgeous chicks, then there's adultery.

She's not available.
No, not Mary-Louise.
No nookie in the weeds.
Another woman I must find.

Jolie's shacked up with Pitt.
I thought she had some wit.
Why can't that crazy chick be mi-i-i-ine?

(instrumental break)

She's not available, someone else will swizz her beatz.
She's not available, Alba won't give me her treats.
But if you tell me Justin Long's gone for one more time
it's not unusual to find out I'm in love with Drew!
And, no, those rumors you've heard about me and the Kardashian sisters are not true. And while I do spend a bit of time on the actual Jersey Shore, that was NOT me on that magazine cover proposing to Snooki. She makes the Kardashians look like teetotalers.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Old Man Ribber - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Michael - Fine job. The first thing I plan on doing if I ever am put in charge of the universe is to get you and Catherine together. Perhaps you two can go on a double date with this old guy and Carrie Fisher. 'Til then, the best I can do is 5 - 5 - 5. ;D
AFW - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Still carrying a torch for the Zeta, eh? Since you're both named Mike, maybe you could fill in as the extra mike..the next time she sings
Patrick - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
A love lost is a sad love song gained. A cynic would say that women are only good for one thing: lyrics.
Michael Pacholek - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Oh, Patrick, women are good for much more than that.
Christie Marie M - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
I get the "she's not available" answer every time I make calls at my work (I just started my job as a telephone sales rep). Anyways, I echo all comments above and some women do play hard to get sometimes! Great work and 5's!
LadyNorCAL - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Lord Pacholek, Lady CZJ will be quite busy carrying for her Knight, as he goes thru his treatments . . . I wish him well, Sir .
Mark Scotti - August 31, 2010 - Report this comment
You get the "fives", though Zeta's dressed to the nines...
Peter Andersson - September 01, 2010 - Report this comment
Be careful what you wish for, it might come true. Or, as a married friend of mine use to say; "being married to a good looking woman is like having a subscription to Playboy Magazine, only it has the same centerfold every month, every year, every damn decade!"...
Michael Pacholek - September 01, 2010 - Report this comment
True story: Last night, Michael Douglas was on David Letterman. As I do not like either one, I didn't watch it. Fortunately, Jay Leno had both Kim Kardashian (sort-of mentioned in the closing comments, and Jay had his band play ZZ Top's song "Tush") and Norah Jones! (He also had Barney Frank, which kind of cancels them out.) Then Jimmy Fallon had his "Fever Pitch" costar Drew Barrymore! Timing is everything!
Old Man Ribber - September 02, 2010 - Report this comment
To the jack*ss who one bombed this - (channeling Joseph Welch at the McCarthy hearings) Have you no sense of decency? Have you no shame, sir? Michael - I've got your blind right side, buddy! ;D

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