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Song Parodies -> "Handicap by the Devil"

Original Song Title:

"Sympathy for the Devil"

Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Handicap by the Devil"

Parody Written by:

Za Tawsch

The Lyrics

Some are said to have seen the shadowy stranger. He shows up on the darkest of evenings where the cart paths cross between the practice green and the Nineteenth Hole. The deal is simple: you'll never have frustration on the course again if just give up your soul. That friend of a friend rounding out your foursome - the one who looks like he or she is teeing it up for the first time - may be getting pro tips from the Prince of Darkness himself!
Please allow me to address this ball
‘Twas my time to tee at Eight
I haven’t played a round in a long, long year
So maybe my score won’t be so great

I was shouting out “Jesus Christ!”
In moments of slice and shank
Made a deal with Satan
Washed my ball and sealed my fate

Pleased to beat you
Hope you see my lie
But what’s puzzling you
Is the distance of my drive

Stuck in the woods on the second hole
When I saw it was a time for some aid
Killed the ball and its mulligan
And Satan parred my eight

I rode a cart in a shotgun start
When the 2 iron hit darts as Luce took part

Pleased to beat you
Hope you see my lie
Ahhh what’s puzzling you
Is how close I hit my five

I watch with glee
All you other three
Laying up to save
Bad shots you’ve made
I shouted out “Who’s putting for birdie?”
When, after all, it was Luce and me

Let me please address this ball
I’ve sold out to play this game
No sand traps or lake hazzards
Will be where my ball lays

Pleased to beat you
Hope you see my lie
But what’s puzzling you
Is how I aced Number Nine

Pleased to beat you
Hope you see my lie, oh yeah
But what’s confusing you
Is just my perfect putting lines

Just has many holes have a dog leg
And all the long putts break
It’s heads, it’s tails just get me Lucifer
‘Cause I’m in need of a drive that’s straight

So if you play me
Have some sturdy tees, have some Toasti-Chees, Nehi Grape
Use all your well-cleaned Titleists
As I lay your score to waste

Pleased to beat you
Hope you see my lie
But what’s puzzling you
Is the precise lob wedge flight

Get down
Get up-n-down
Tell me caddy
Where I lie
Tell me caddy
Wind left or right
Tell me caddy
How far away
Tell me caddy
It’s my play

What I lie
Tell me caddy
Where I lie
Tell me caddy
What to play

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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 4   0
 5   1

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