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Song Parodies -> "Under My Gums"

Original Song Title:

"Under My Thumb"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Under My Gums"

Parody Written by:

Bob Gomez

The Lyrics

Under my gums
The germs have grown--
Can't deny--
Under my gums
The buccal flora's
Multiplied--

Pits 'round my teeth!
I maybe flossed once in my life--
'Round my teeth:
Microbial slums, they're
Under my gums!

Pain in the tooth, babe--

Under my gums
Some oatmeal scones have
Just left their trace;
Under my gums
Some turkey strands
Just gone to waste;

Grits 'round my teeth!
Yes, it's grits!
That baked lasagna's turned to mold!
'Round my teeth
Crumbcake left crumbs, they're
Under my gums!

Ow! Ow! Say it's alright--

Under my gums:
Some Japanese
Fat from an eel;
Under my gums:
Philippine-ish, mmmm,
Fresh mango peel;

Sit down and eat!
The way you rolfed when I spoke to you--
Bound to be
Decayed red plums, they're
Under my gums!

Ah, taste is cheesy, babe--
Yeah!

Mints are the key!
Oh, yeah!
All day I chomp on those Altoids, too,
Constantly
Rolaids and Tums, they're
Under my gums!

Yeah, it feels alright--

Putrefied gums!
My hygienist just
Wept to herself!
Under my gums, her nose
Might detect some unearthly smells!

Spit out my teeth!
Oh, that's what they said!
They may use caulk for my broken tooth!
Ow! My teeth!
It tastes like chum, what's
Under my gums!

Say it's alright...

Say it's all...
Say it's all...

Taste is cheesy, babe...
Taste is cheesy, babe...
Feels alright...
Scrape it, scrape it easy, babe...
©Bob Gomez 2013

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - February 15, 2013 - Report this comment
Bob - 555 containers of floss and alcohol-free mouthwash. ;D
Bob Gomez - February 15, 2013 - Report this comment
Thanks, Old buddy. Is that the stuff Mormons use?
John Lomain - February 15, 2013 - Report this comment
And now I wish I hadn't postponed my dentist appt. Grossly funny
TJC - February 15, 2013 - Report this comment
That was a mouthful! Forget these 5's—someone oughta give you a plaque!
Lots of great lingo employed with creative variations.
Wendy Christopher - February 16, 2013 - Report this comment
555 for funny - but I'm probably not going to eat the rest of my dinner now... ;^)
Bob Gomez - February 16, 2013 - Report this comment
Thanks, Wendy. I'm having mine through a straw.

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