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Song Parodies -> "Sympathy for Santa"

Original Song Title:

"Sympathy for the Devil"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Sympathy for Santa"

Parody Written by:

Bob Gomez

The Lyrics

Santa Claus as alcoholic curmudgeon.
Please allow me to introduce myself,
I'm a man of belted waist--
I've been around for long, long years,
I've grabbed from many a man's cookie tray

I look around and, Jesus Christ!
Have you gift-givers gone insane???
I'd much prefer that Target
Peddled stuff that's less inane!

Pleased to greet you,
Happy Holiday!
But what's troublin', true, is the
Lame stuff all you gave!

I've hung around St. Petersburg
Because Florida's nice for a change!
Had Dasher, Donder and Blitzen, first
Order drinks, then
Keep to shade!
My driving stank, ended up in the tank,
In the Escalade was a bawdy skank!

Pleased to greet you,
Happy Holidays!
But what's troublin' PETA's the
Reindeer are my slaves!

I watched with glee while your twins and teens
Fought for videogames
Or the Elmo craze!
I shouted out "Who's filled these hosieries?",
When after all, it was Dollar Tree!
Though chimneys squeeze, when I sluice myself,
I am a man of stealth and grace,
And I take crap from humidors,
Smoke two Cubans 'fore I reach fireplace!

Pleased to greet you,
Happy Holidays!
But what sucks, in truth is com-
Mercials robbed my name!

(Glockenspiel solo, elves on maracas singing "hoo-hoo!")

Pleased to greet you,
Happy Holidays!
But go on snugglin', snooze, just for
Clement Clarke Moore's sake!

So stop giving crap! It's just criminal,
Gives cause to cringe and faint!
If memory fails, just call me Nicholas,
Originated as a saint!
If I discreetly chug well-earned whiskey,
Have some sympathy, don't complain!
These malls are hell, slurred groggyness
Might betray my
Swollen face!

Pleased to greet you,
Happy Holidays!
Butt-munch, chuggin' juice is the
Savior of my day!
©Bob Gomez 2006

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   15
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User Comments

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Green Bloodied Hound Dogs - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
I Love This!!!!!!!!!!
Jack Wilson - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Awesome Job, Bob! 555!
Bob Gomez - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, dudes, turn up the volume, have a rockin' holiday!
Ann Hammond - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
lol
Rich - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent! Brilliant parody! I wrote one to the song of Frosty the Snowman,but its only heard by my co-workers.Its about a guy at work.
PMS - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Great pacing to the OS. LOL funny
Meriadoc - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Nice job Bob! We have something similar in the works - hope to get up this coming week... :-)
Bob Gomez - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Thank you, Ann, Rich, PMS (hope the headaches and flashes are better), and Merry--can't wait for your next story of Santa Gone Bad! q;:Ω)
The Charnstar - December 17, 2006 - Report this comment
DAMN IT! You got the same idea as me, the only Christmas parody idea I got was done right before me! CURSE YE! On a lighter note, GREAT parody here, loved the original, loved the parody even more 5-5-5
Jack Wilson - December 17, 2006 - Report this comment
I'll admit I wish I had this idea too, once again, this is awesome!
Phil Alexander - December 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent, Bob.
Bob Gomez - December 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Charnstar: I know how you feel. You're halfway through writing a parody, you check the site and see it's been done twice as well!
Jack: Thanks again, man, I appreciate it.
Phil: Wishing you and yours an excellent holiday!
Yoidy - December 17, 2006 - Report this comment
All I can say is, from Hell sprung Noel! Great job! 555
Michael Pacholek - December 18, 2006 - Report this comment
You're gonna have half of West Virginia in your stocking. That's a lot of coal. Maybe the parody fairy can balance it out with some fives.
DBear - December 20, 2006 - Report this comment
The St. Petersburg line was brilliant. Way to twist the original

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