[instrumental intro]

Gruesome pains shoot 'bove my rear
down my spine and lower back
don't feel right; I'm getting old
think I might just take a nap
use heat or maybe use some ice
sure need relief - Ow!
ought to try some on my shoulder, man
It sure feels bad right now

This bites, I hate this - pain sucks
my pain in back; extreme
lie on side and tell my wife
"Please bring me some codeine"
I told her "thanks, I need these dear
perhaps I'll sleep some now"
I said, "Thanks so much",and then told her
"I'm hungry for some chow"

Hurting so; I rant
pain's; really bad
"Could you bring some Motrin, please?
And dear, then could you bring some books to me?
I would like something to read
stuck in bed; so I need remote
Could you please bring it now?
And then could you rub my shoulder, then?"
She punched me, I said, "Ow"

[instrumental section]

{What was that for, honey bun?}
{Did I not just say, "please"}
{She said, "You just have sore back}
{Not someTerminal Disease}
{Tired of your constant calls}
{I'm tired of all of your needs}
If this sh*t continues for too long
Your calls I will not heed

"it's hard", I snarled
"to lay in bed
my old ass is a wreck
this situation's stinky
and more pain I can expect"
heating pad; it was set too high
I'm seared; then "Ouch", I howled
Then my wife came and said, "What now, man?
Just what do you want now?"