The Lyrics

While it's been hailed by the critics and many fans alike, I have to express my FURY at the fact that several VERY important issues were left out of the latest Harry Potter film. I don't care if Cuaron wanted to change the look of the film as much as I HATE that he left out half the story....which could have been included with 15-20 extra minutes of dialogue. I don't think anyone would have complained. Anyway...this is just my own opinion...writing it was therapy...I think I'm going to make it through...

Hey Dude,
You've made me sad
Made this film wrong
Could have been better
I watched it and felt a break in my heart
Right from the start
Should have been better

Hey Dude,
Where was your brain?
Someone paid you
Should not have let her
The minute you left out half of the plot
I cried a lot
Into my sweater

So many things you chose to change
Hey Dude, it's plain
I hope you can see the damage you've done
For don't you know that you're a fool to change my school
You made that whole world a little less fun

Na na na na na na na na na

Hey Dude,
You let me down
You forgot to
Tell half the story
Marauders--what was their hist'ry about?
You sold them out
For your own glory

Emotion's out, technique is in,
Hey Dude, within
I'm glad you're not working on "The Goblet"
'Cause now I know just what you'd do, Hey Dude, it's true
You'd pro-bab-ly leave out the tourn-a-ment

Na na na na na na na na na

Hey Dude
Don't think you're rad
Turned Fantastic
To mediocre
My sorrows, don't know just where to begin
Why'd you throw in
A choir with
Croakers croakers croakers croakers croakers croakers?

Oh!

Na na na na na, na na na, hey Dude...
Na na na na na, na na na, you're rude...

(repeat to fade)

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User Comments

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Kristof Robertson - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

I may not do LOTR, but I had to comment on this...you are so right, Cuaron dropped the ball big time. Azkaban was my favourite Potter book, and he ruined it, glossing over the heart of the story. Well said, girlfriend. 555

Agrimorfee - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Well whatdoyawant, there's only so much that can be done in a 3-hour time span! "Goblet" will have to be a double movie, with that ever-expanding plotline. Irregardless, 534. Cheers.

Cookie-man - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Poor, poor Arwen. I feel your pain. Great job!

Arwen - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Kristof...that's just what I love about you...you're always here in my time of need. Thanks, sweetie. And thanks, Cookie-man, too. And Agri...Long story (turned) short...I WISH I had gotten a 3 hour span. I didn't get it. He shaved it down to 2 hours and 15 minutes...because he was so worried it would be too long. He seriously could have saved the whole thing with 15 minutes more in the Shrieking Shack...and I would have loved him. He doesn't yet realize the torture it means not to be loved by Arwen...but he will...

Ravyn Rant - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

A review you can sing. Let's see Ebert and that guy who isn't Siskel top that! All fives for you...

Agrimorfee - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Ar--at least he still has "The Secret Garden" and "Y Tu Mama Tambien" under his belt. ;)

2nz - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

I agree whole-heartedly about the book-to-movie translation. People who read the book understood the plot a lot more because of it. No one understood why Lupin knew how to read the map, and Trelawney was shafted big-time, which would have provided some more comic relief throughout the film. That said, Cuaron handled the time-travel element very well and while I was confused by what he omitted, I wasn't disappointed by the movie. I found the change in style refreshing, and ever since I saw the second film, I have expected a movie that leaves out lots of important facts. 5's

Arwen - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Thanks, Ravyn...I have to admit that a movie critic is one of my many dream jobs...(i would also like to be a screenwriter...but if i did that, i'd have to act in all my films, because nobody else would do my heriones justice, of course...and i would also give my left foot to be a professional tap dancer...but...i think we can all see how that bargain kind of shoots itself in the...er...foot)...and yeah...the singing angle might just get me a gig, huh?? I can sing ALL my reviews!! And 2nz...here's the nail...you've hit in on the head...thanks!!!

Ashkicksass - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

I share your pain wholeheartedly. Book 3 was my favorite too, and I don't think he did it justice in any way, shape, or form. I especially laughed at your choir line. SERIOUSLY, what the hell was that? Frog puppets? So Stupid. 555

Arwen - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

So so glad you approve, Ashkicksass...=) Thanks!

Johnny D - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

555, good job here, Arwen. I don't know a lot about Harry Potter...... but..... regarding LOTR....... I can say that I experienced a homeopathic amount of bummed-out-ed-ness at the way Peter Jackson eliminated Sam Gamgee's short stint as a Ring-Bearer, and at how he handled the ending of LOTR-TROTK, vis-a-vis suggesting that the ship Frodo, Bilbo, and Gandalf sailed West on was the "last ship" when in fantasy-fact Elves sailed for many, many more years after LOTR, and Sam was thought to have eventually sailed West, too, because he was a Ring-Bearer while Frodo was trapped by Shelob........see? I'm just as much of a LOTR geek as thee, mi'Lady.

Arwen - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Gotcha. I'm really not all that particular, generally. I understand that not everything from a novel can be included in a film...without it being like 8 hours long. HOWEVER...Cuaron chose to cut out basic information that is really very important...for the rest of the series...and for the spirit of the story...which he could have easily left in without making it too much longer....hmph. Oh well...thanks so much!!! You are awesome, Johnny!

alvin rhodes - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

good stuff here....watch out crying into your sweater..it will leave stains..oops, that was your LAST parody..5s

Arwen - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Good advice, mr. rhodes. Actually, when I wrote that line, I thought of my OTHER other parody..."Somebody Stole My Sweater." =) Thanks so much for the vote and kind words!!

Rick D - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

All the reviewers are raving about the new movie. I found it to be a little draggier than the previous, and there were glaring omissions and errors. I would have shortened that bus ride and gotten to the school quicker, which seemed to move all its landmarks to rockier ground. And I love how a rat can become a fully dressed man, but when he becomes a rat again, all those clothes drop to the ground.

Arwen - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment

Rick...thanks for dropping by. Of course, I agree with your comments about the film...(I think the rat thing crossed everyone's mind...along with the new locale)...but I just got back from seeing it for the second time...(I took my niece and nephew)...and I have to admit...that going into it with my expectations eliminated...it was actually quite a bit better. Does that make sense? If they haven't read the books...and they just went in blind...I guess I can see how the critics are raving. I liked it better this time...though I'm still disappointed overall...

Flibbertigibbet - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment

Personally, "Prisoner of Azkaban" was good. Far better than the first two movies. What? Did you want Chris Columbus to direct this one? If he did, he would have done it wrong. I heard Spielberg was in the run for director on this movie, which would have been a big mistake.(he's doing War of the Worlds, with Tom Cruise as star, which will ruin that movie) So, "Prisoner of Azkaban" was really good. I gave you three 1's.

Arwen - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment

I'm glad you liked the movie. I don't have a preference as to who directed it. I went, the first time, with people who hadn't read the books. When we left, they were confused about a lot of things...that they would have understood if a little bit more explanation had been included in the film. I felt bad for them...because it's such a great story, and they got short changed. If you read all of the comments, though, you'll see that I saw it again...and that it's growing on me. Regardless...the fact that I expected more from it, however, and that we disagree on something...does not mean that my pacing was off. Think about it.

the watcher of the ones-voters - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment

Flibbertigibbet, you are to be commended - for your personal reasons you decided to vote 1-1-1 on this parody, but you had the courage and the courtesy to do it publicly, taking responsibility for your vote by attaching your name to it. Regardless of what anyone thinks of your rationale for voting 1-1-1, it's safe to say that everybody at Amiright appreciates your courage and honesty. Thank you.

Your Worst Nightmare - June 11, 2004 - Report this comment

DKTOS, so can't vote. I SO agree with you. I was disappointed too, because Prisoner of Azkaban was my favorite Harry Potter book. I hope this funny and weird site will cheer you up. http://www.potterpuppetpals.com "botherbotherbotherbotherbotherbotherbotherbotherbother"

Kat - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment

I liked the movie,but I see your point.

Arwen - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment

Thanks, Kat. I liked it a LOT more the second time around. Once I knew what to expect...as far as what he'd left out...I was able to appreciate the visually entertaining nature of the film. It's still not as good as it should have been, though...=)

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