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Song Parodies -> "2034 (When I'm 64 Like Michael Douglas Is Now)"

Original Song Title:

"When I'm 64"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"2034 (When I'm 64 Like Michael Douglas Is Now)"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

For some time now, my home computer has been on the fritz, and the boss has been cracking down on my non-work computer usage. I needed a big reason to come back. I found one: An elderly man I never really liked hanging around with a beautiful woman who doesn't have enough experience to be Vice President or President of the United States. Who could I be talking about? Why, today's birthday boy, of course.
When I get older, just isn't fair
many years from now
will I have a so-much-younger valentine?
Welsh brunette with lips sweet like wine?
If I wake up at quarter to three
will she open bathroom door?
Douglas, he's got one.
Will I have caught one
when I'm 64?

I'll be older, true...
But if she'll say the word
I could love her, too.

I could be handy, take her to games
at new Stadium.
Show her Bernie Williams' Monument Park plaque.
Watch those Yankees knock home runs back.
Of course, with inflation, seats that we'd get
miles above the floor.
I will be crashing
she'll still be smashing
when I'm 64!

Every summer, we could rent a cottage
down at Point Pleasant Beach
if it's not too dear.
By that point we'd see
(By that point see)
our children play with those
of Rachel and Ashley!

It won't be Catherine, say with despair
in my field of view.
Indicate precisely that what she means to be:
Eighteen now, then be forty-three!
It's May-December, Christmassy feel
ours forevermore!
That's what I'm hoping:
to avoid this moping
in 2034!
Hoo!
My nieces Ashley and Rachel will be 27 when I'm 64.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   9
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User Comments

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alvin - September 25, 2008 - Report this comment
as wistful as the OS....i like how you tossed bernie williams in here...lol
Andy Primus - September 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Good one. Unless you're loaded with cash the only things you'll be pulling at 64 are back muscles & other 64 year olds if you're lucky.
TJC - September 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Good one! So you're ~ 38 now... if you can lay your hands on a somatic cell from Catherine's coffee cup and plop it in your uterine replicator pronto... should be just about right May/Dec chemistry in 26 yrs or so...
John Barry - September 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Good job for one so young.
Melanie Lee - September 25, 2008 - Report this comment
I suspected you might be in your 30s! So, you're 38, eh? I'm almost 52. And you want a younger woman, or at least, you will want one. (sigh) Oh, well.

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