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Song Parodies -> "Along Comes Barry"

Original Song Title:

"Along Comes Mary"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Association

Parody Song Title:

"Along Comes Barry"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

This is my 756th parody. Here's hoping Barry Bonds never reaches 756 home runs.
(Bonds)
Every time I think that I'm the only one who's cheating
someone's caught, not me!
And every now and then I play again
when I feel like it
take my fee!

(The Fans)
And then along comes Barry!
And does he wanna get his kicks?
Then in his arm he's gonna stick
that big syringe!
And that is how his mound of forty pounds he gained
and got his home-run binge!

He took the stuff because his bat's out to lunch!
Now his empty cup is the proof of the punch!

La-da-da-da!

(Bonds)
My vague desire is on fire
in the eyes of fans who can't admit I am the best!
The reason that it's vague's a plague
'cause I can't this feeling off my chest!

(The Fans)
And then along comes Barry!
And he still makes us all annoyed
because we know he took steroids
it's plain to see!
He won't lie like Rafael
he just gives us hell
won't tell the truth like Giambi!

He took the stuff because his bat's out to lunch!
Now his empty cup is the proof of the punch!

La-da-da-da!
Wha-do-wha!

(instrumental break)

(Bonds)
And when the morning of the warning's passed
I'm gassed and flaccid
but I'm still a real big star!
The psychodramas and the traumas gone.
Don't pay attention to my track-mark scars!

(The Fans)
And then along comes Mary
And does he want to be a shame
kill the game, dead remains of all the pains
he left the night before?
Or will our waking eyes reflect his lies
make Selig realize our urgent cry for him no more?

He took the stuff because his bat's out to lunch!
Now his empty cup is the proof of the punch!

Proof of the punch!

Proof of the punch!

Proof of the punch!

Proof of the punch!
The "empty cup" could refer to his unwillingness to take a steroid test. Or it could refer to an effect that steroids had on the contents of his jockstrap.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
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 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin rhodes - October 02, 2005 - Report this comment
a masterpiece...and on an extremely tough song to do...i'm with you ....i hope bonds doesn't even make it to 714....5s plus
John Jenkins - October 02, 2005 - Report this comment
This is really good, MP (except for an apparent typo in the last Fans verse - Mary, not Barry). I don't remember Barry Bonds' bat ever being "out to lunch," but he certainly started feasting when he started putting on weight.
Michael Pacholek - October 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Yeah, I saw that goof only when it was too late. My failure to fix the direct copy of the lyrics, not Barry's steroid goof.
Eric Hamell - December 03, 2023 - Report this comment
Excellent work. There seems to be a word missing on line 17, where it should say "can't get this."

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