There is a town out in the hills
A place called Alderson
And it's been a prison for many a poor gal
And Martha Stewart's one

Now Martha was a baker
She kept her kitchen clean
She made some fancy pastry puffs
All filled with whipping cream

Now the thing they say that Martha did
Was lie about a stock
And she should've kept her mouth shut tight
Like stuff it with a sock

Oh mother, tell your daughters
Not to do what Martha's done
Spend some time in a penitentiary
Like the one that's in Alderson

Well I hope she'll write her memoirs
And talk about the pain
The time she spent in Alderson
Tied with a ball and chain

Well, there is a town out in the hills
A place called Alderson
And it's been a prison for many a poor gal
And Martha Stewart's one