I work divorces, it's so good to get a vengeful wife
She never cares how much it costs, she wants to wreck his life
Before I take a nasty case that's gonna get real hot
I just check out their bank account to see how much they got

Golden showers on them all
Written on my law firm's wall
Justice system's a big con
Life of savings up and gone
Filing suits and writs and all those nasty suh-peenas, too
Now don't tell me I've no one to screw

When property and children make a war for custody
I make sure when they're divvied up the cash is left for me
They never think how much they'd save by sett'ling out of court
Yes, this job pays me so much you'd think I played a sport

Golden showers on them all
Written on my law firm's wall
Justice system's a big con
Life of savings up and gone
Filing suits and writs and all those nasty suh-peenas, too
Now don't tell me I've no one to screw

I guess life's strange, I come to find that "Karma" is a force
Last night I got the news my wife is filing for divorce
Found she went and hired an attorney that is tough
I won't be missing her at all, but boy I'll miss my stuff

Golden showers on them all
Written on his law firm's wall
Justice system's a big con
Life of savings up and gone
Getting suits and writs and all those nasty suh-peenas, too
Now don't tell me I hadn't a clue

Now don't tell me that I shouldn't sue