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Song Parodies -> "Pacholek"

Original Song Title:

"Goldfinger"

Original Performer:

Shirley Bassey and The Other John A. Barry

Parody Song Title:

"Pacholek"

Parody Written by:

Tommy Turtle

The Lyrics

Based on Mike's "Saturday Night With the Floozies". "Degenerate" is read as the verb, rhyming with "date", rather than the adjective that would rhyme (sort of) with "get".
Pa-cho-lek
He's the Mike, the Mike who so bashes Bush
Like, trashes Bush

Such al-co-hole-ic
Drunken daze, desires de-gen-er-ate
Don't got no date!

Walking through Central Park with his booze
Doesn't want a nice girl, wants a flooze
Has to shell out swag 'ere he has kissed her
"That's a hundred
Bucks, now, Mister!"...

Pa-cho-lek
Pros-ti-tutes, pursue Pachy's pot of gold
Your tw*t is sold!

Propositions he'll pour in your ear
Then he'll put money in your brassiere
Needs his nooky now, no need to dicker
Pachy pays the
Price to stick her!

Pa-cho-lek
Working girls, this rube's read-y to be rolled
Do as you're told!
Big bills he'll unfold
If cajoled
Hand: out, hold
Be brazen and bold
Girls, get "Pole-d"
He has go-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-old!


"Saturday Night With the Floozies" © Michael Pacholek. OS might be here. All else © 2006 Tommy Turtle.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 3.5
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   1
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 4   0
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User Comments

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alvin rhodes - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks for the skinny..lol
Stephen Harrington - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, interesting nevertheless.
Uhhh... - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
OK, where to begin... To paraphrase my new favorite movie, if they come for me, harboring a fugitive Turtle will be the least of my worries. The truth is, I do want a nice girl. I've given many specific examples in various parodies, though too many of them are addicted to a certain drug (see "Smoke and Now Mike Cries"). Then there's the one who's both naughty AND nice, but she lives in Wyoming, 2/3 of the way across the country. So... oh, forget it, the way you used the word "dicker" is worthy of a five all by itself.
AFW - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Clever inside spoof
Max Power - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL
Oh, I do, do I? - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Assuming I considered Tommy Turtle to be an enemy, which I do not... Dead, he would be of no use to me. Alive, and filled with fear of what my reprisals would be... If I was truly offended, I would have dropped the parody bomb on him, and it would appear with the next batch of new ones. That won't happen. This was a minor offense, and so he gets punished with nothing more than the old George Carlin question: "If a turtle loses its shell, is it naked or homeless?" (Actually, a turtle can't survive without its shell, so it would be dead.) Relax, Tommy, this is the real Mike, not the dimwitted fascist who is apparently obsessed with me lately. It's probably the guy calling himself "Sarcastic Paranoid," who clumsily wrote "Leftard Don't Know How to Read," ignoring (naturally) the fact that it is Georgie Bush who doesn't read (things like Condi Rice's memo about Osama bin Laden's hijack plans), and then cowardly not leaving room for comments. Tommy, you are free to parody, much to that guy's dismay. Exercise your freedom!
Larry Hensley - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Also DKTOS, but it was good.
TT - March 21, 2006 - Report this comment
alvin, Stephen, Uhh..., AFW, Max, Michael, Oh I do, and Larry, thanks.
MP, thought you were having an internal struggle there :) I have a parody idea or two on the issue of free speech... and, go ahead and do your worst (parody) on TT; it's all in good fun!
Olvan The Terrible - March 22, 2006 - Report this comment
Yeah, something tells me the REAL Michael Pacholek would be above making death threats and calling people faggots.
Michael Pacholek - March 22, 2006 - Report this comment
Not only am I above it, but it's beneath me. I wish some other things were beneath me, but most of them are married.
TT - March 22, 2006 - Report this comment
Was never worried about it in the first place... Didn't think it was real MP, but if it were, chose to take it as a facetious compliment. No sweat either way!

BTW, (real) Michael, "minor offense..."??? It's a Major PLUG for ya, man!! Ya know what Barnum said, right???

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