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Song Parodies -> "(Dismembered) Wokkin’ Tim and Stan"

Original Song Title:

"(Remember) Walking in the Sand"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Shangri-Las

Parody Song Title:

"(Dismembered) Wokkin’ Tim and Stan"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Seems just the other day,
guys they knew went away.
They went astray? Possibly.
And soon the tears will flow,
because folks are gonna know:
there’s a Jeff Daumer wannabe,
who makes a wicked stew
of body parts and roux.
Rhône’s what he drinks,
not wine pink,
after each chew.

[protracted lamentations]

(Dismembered) wokkin’ Tim and Stan
(Dismembered) wokkin’ hands and glands
(Dismembered) each bite is so inviting
(Dismembered) those eyes are quite delighting
(Dismembered) degustation of cheeks
(Dismembered) delish fingertips
Soft, so soft were those eaten lips

That is what happened to
the boys that they once knew.
The gourmand’s enjoying Stew.
So, that’s what happened to
the live ones who were slew.
He’d rather Lou than a cow.

(Dismembered) wokkin’ Slim and Dan
(Dismembered) wokkin’ hands in pan
(Dismembered) each bite is so inviting
(Dismembered) those thighs are quite delighting
(Dismembered) degustation ain’t beef
(Dismembered) fingers trump tri-tips
Bodies chomped by those feedin’ lips
Din’s tender.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

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Rob Arndt - July 14, 2014 - Report this comment
Eloquently stated JAB-555! Glad you are still around as the MASTER here on AiR. I reached 2400 and now am near 2450, but do not really intend to reach #1 here at all; I may reach #2, but that is it for me. I am doing more entertainment submissions here and there as well, but am near 4050 anyway. I already accomplished everything I wanted to do here. I only do 3-6 parodies a week now down from 25+ in my early peak years. My first partial year I did 848 and then 899 in 2012. Then slowed down in 2013 and now am approaching 200 in July 2014. I may take this OS or your parody and do "Panzers in the Sand" as I don't have any real Rommel or Afrika Korps parodies except for maybe concerning Marseilles and his victories in his Bf 109F Trop. Keep writing JAB- you're my hero here :)
John Barry - July 14, 2014 - Report this comment
Thanks again, Rob! I feel the same way about accomplishment. Pretty burned out after 10-plus years.
Anon - July 15, 2014 - Report this comment
Hey, Rob -- here's something to provoke you. I went through 22 pages of your extended info and found only two parodies with more than 500 hits, and they were written in 2011. In general, the number of hits you get is pitifully low. Yet, you never mention this crucial statistic in your version of sabermetrics. How do you explain your astounding lack of popularity? I, on the other hand, am the world's most quoted poet and philosopher.
Jonathan - July 15, 2014 - Report this comment
is it weird that I'm hungry after reading this? ...5's
Rob Arndt - July 15, 2014 - Report this comment
Anon-y-mouse, hits don't automatically mean success nor popularity. They are stats that can and are manipulated or misinterpreted. People who argue on the comments like political parodies for instance may get 100s of hits but in reality it may be 10 people revisting that page 10x to see their comments or other comments. Nothing is definative with hits. I claim production records and never claimed to be an incredible parodist, just a busy one! I know that I have a niche base of people and that typically I may get 50 hits or so. My materials are mostly controversial and some people may not want to read about war, weapons, women, or weird topics. But I do have an amazing amount of compiled info if you went through and read all of them- an encyclopedia of knowledge of varying degree and depth. Many things I write about are little-known or unknown... or at least no other parodist on-site will or ever would write about such things. I do and it doesn't bother me. I had numbers objectives and reached them just like JAB. And of course some people have far more fans than I and typically get more hits... doesn't mean that each of their parodies is lyrical gold. Far from it- some high vets have plenty of hits but low ratings overall. Same thing- stats can be manipulated and/or misinterpreted. Other parodists here that have very low numbers have written very good parodies and are not popular either and so their hits may be low as well. I'll give you a numbers scenario to relate to: during WW2 Germany produced 1433 Me-262 jets, so people think it was a failure b/c it couldn't change the air war despite superior performance and armament. But of that 1433, only around 330 got to units (3 of them: Ekdo 262, JG 7, and JV 44) and of those only 149 actually saw combat against bomber streams of 800-1000 bombers + 500 escorts! Yet they killed 509 Allied bombers, fighters, recon, and strike aircraft. On average, only a handful ever went up together and sometimes the numbers were so low due to lack of fuel or % being worked on that they were outnumbered in the air 150+:1!!! So, the Me-262 was not a failure as a warplane, it was heavily outnumbered and outgunned in the air. Same go for the Tiger tanks that could kill 8:1 but were outnumbered 10:1 on the Western Front and over 20:1 on the Ostfront!!! More often than not the tanks were killed by airpower called in b/c the Shermans and Cromwells were useless (except the Firefly version of the Sherman with the 17 Pdr) and Soviet armor (which was better than Allied) had to close to dangerous low ranges to score a side or rear shot. Anyway, I do not care about popularity here or anywhere. I write decent parodies and lots of them and also do a lot of entertainment submissions that you and the others dismiss- try putting up nearly 4050 of them in 3.5 years. Also, my Fragments are unrtouchable, selected by Editor, and well over 90% of them get posted. Once ran 8 weeks in a row. Am easily on my second week this week and dominate that category as well as 6 others as Number 1. Three other categories are Numbers 2, 5, and 6. But you already know that and are wasting your time trying to bug me with trivial things. If you are so great, please be a man/woman and post your author sheet and your submission record and your accomplishments here. If you are popular, than more power to you- perhaps I've even 555'd you...???

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