I can't get no, Janet Jackson,
I can't get no, Mormon action, ( Super Bowl action )
'Cause I'm snide,
My brain's fried,
Got no pride,
And I'm shy!
I can't disco!
No, no, no!
Hey, hey hey!
I'm not that gay!
When I'm hustling with a schlep,
And I'm sliding here,
And I'm kicking there,
And I'm trying to stay in step.
But I've got two left feet,
And I just can't sing,
That Village People thing! ( Hoo! Hoo! )
I can't disco! ( Etc, etc... )
When I'm in my vest & bells,
And I'm drinking this,
And I'm smoking that,
'Til my breath simply smells,
But I can't pick up chicks,
Because of the way,
That polyester sticks!
I can't disco! ( Etc, etc... )
When I'm at the roller rink,
And I clap my hands,
And dip my knees,
But my karioke stinks!
'Cause I can't carry a tune,
Or walk like I,
Just landed on the moon!
I can't disco! ( Etc, etc... )
I'm a schitzo! ( Repeat )
My brainn's in traction. ( Repeat & fade )