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Song Parodies -> "A White, Blade-Laden Whale"

Original Song Title:

"A Whiter Shade of Pale"

Original Performer:

Procol Harum

Parody Song Title:

"A White, Blade-Laden Whale"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

I added a verse. . .it's a long novel.
A White, Blade-Laden Whale

The skipper was a psycho,
Dragged pegleg 'cross the floor.
I was feeling kind of seasick,
As we lost sight of shore.
Naught but salt beef in the larder
And the sheeting flailed away.
Once in a while we get grog to drinkó
Made our cares sail away.

Now that salty raconteur
Named Ishmael tells his tale:
How our sturdy ship was stove in
By a white, blade-laden whale.

Ahab said, "It be treason
If thou dost not follow me."
Then he nailed a gold coin to the sparó
Incentive all could see.
We had 16 vessel sturgeons
We were cleaning for a roast.
And when the fish guts were opened,
Queequeg gasped and threw his bones.

He's a prognosticator
And the innards told the tale:
That the Pequod would be stove in
By a white, blade-laden whale.

The gold coin, it was sparstuckó
No white whale did we see,
Then the first mate, Mr. Starbuck
And Ahab didn't agree.
But the captain was insistent,
So much so that he did rave.
His Moby monomania
Sent us to a wat'ry grave.

Now that salty raconteur
Named Ishmael tells his tale:
How our sturdy ship was stove in
By a white, blade-laden whale.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   9

User Comments

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Phil Alexander - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Awesome stuff, JAB :-)
Adagio - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Really good..5's...stopped in here at first because I saw that it was by Procul Harum. You did justice to their song.
Ashkicksass - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS well enough to vote, but I had to read the rest of today's trilogy. From what I do know of the song you did a great job!
Johnny D - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody is brilliant stuff
Ahab was quite a fool
And likewise if Moby's Dick is hard
This parody is cool
When Melville met John Barry
Whaling history was made
So we cast our fives so gladly
For the White Whale's Blighted Blade

And so it was
That later
Eating crullers that were stale
That I placed knockwurst more closely
To a white-gloved
Mermaid's tail

Dee Range - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent work, John. High 5's to nail to the mast
alvin rhodes - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
rarely does a parody fit the original tune in spirit so well...great job...5s
John Barry - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Phil; Adagio, thanks--I always liked WSOP a lot; Ash, thanks--the original has some hypnotic organ playing; JD, ahoy, mate; Dee, thanks; thanks, Alvin--this seemed to beg for a nautical treatment.
Paul Robinson - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
JB - A whale of a job here. 5's. I only wish I had been able to read this parody in high-school English Lit instead of that damned long, boring novel by Melville. It had me wishing that Herman was a Hermit who had never met a publisher.
martha - August 11, 2004 - Report this comment
fabulous John ...
Marilyn Cormier - October 15, 2010 - Report this comment
And to think this was inspired by Paul Croteau's comparion of himself to Ishmael! You have to know the story behind this. "And the innards told the tale"! John, just how does your mind work? For the rest of you, John went to high school with Paul, me and a few others who are planning a ??th class reunion for next August. (Yes, he's that old.) Am fearful what parodies that will inspire. Thanks, John. Do you do any in French?

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