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Song Parodies -> "A Faulty Dog"

Original Song Title:

"A Salty Dog"

Original Performer:

Procol Harum

Parody Song Title:

"A Faulty Dog"

Parody Written by:

Andy Primus

The Lyrics

Pissed as a newt = English slang for drunk
Our hound’s a wreck…pissed as a newt…I think he’s caned on rye
He stole a nip…an’ now he’s crook…I hope he will survive
We’re best of mates…a hound forlorn…my ma and sisters cry
A drunken bark…his throat is hoarse…at least he’s still alive

He wailed: it smarts…upset the pan…some chips I’d tried to fry
Won’t scoff my steak…nor touch his bowl…won’t snatch our chitlins pie
Upon the seventh…dog sick day…we gave our vet a call
A grand per night…the fee that’s due…no normal case at all

We hired the son…he turned up fast…mutt gave him gyp galore
The lad was fried…I prayed an’ wept…his beers, our fears: no joy
His notes were long…he read them wrong…aghast, he should be banned
A faulty dog…who likes his grog…our pet has been trepanned

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Mark Scotti - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
HILARIOUS, Andy!!! And great, great OS!!! Everyone keeps forgetting about that classic from Procol Harum. They only know "Whiter Shade of Pale" or "Conqistador".... Gotta love thos defective dogs... Mine barks 555...
John Barry - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
Extra credit for "trepanned." Gotta be a first.
NorCALvotress - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
It has been said that, "He" once taught a Coyote to sing "Auf WiederSehen, Sweetheart ". . . . . When He craves cerVeza, only Dos XX's will satisfy Him. Stay thirsty, hombre!
alvin - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
great job on a classic.OS..very poetic
Andy Primus - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks Mark - it's always been a fave of mine along with Homburg & Pandora's Box
Thanks John, NorCALv & Alvin
AFW - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
Top job on this, Andy...and noted something weird..these lyrics would also fit, exactly, an old song called, "Enjoy Yourself"
Andy Primus - June 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks AFW

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