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Song Parodies -> "Wiped His Shirted Tail"

Original Song Title:

"Whiter Shade of Pale"

Original Performer:

Procol Harum

Parody Song Title:

"Wiped His Shirted Tail"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

zounds!: euphemistic contraction of "God's wounds," employed as a mild oath; nates: buttocks; olefin: a synthetic fiber; raiment: clothing; mards: turds; compote: fruit cooked in syrup; cloacal: a cloaca is a sewer; vale: valley, derivation possibly linked to Latin "volvere," to roll
He dripped in shite bran, mangoes--
First a fart peal, then a roar.
He was feeling kind of "C"* sick;
Quite loud was his outpour.
It boomed--once in the larder
Was the feed, which blew away.
In the hall, zounds! the mother did stink. . .
Awaited the last spray.

Now soaking were his nates,
And the milled olefin trailed,
Interfaced with his butt, grossly.
Turds! He wiped his shirted tail.

[organ solo, with all stops open]

The sensation, not pleasin'--
"How uncouth!" his plaintive plea.
He had laundered with his raiment, mards--
Soiled haberdashery.
Bum he sticks 'tween vestment, vergin'
On cleaning of clumped compote.
His cloacal "eye" had opened. . .
He'd not smelled up his greatcoat.

Though he'd not soaked his great'; he's
Had spillway rolled through sh*t's vale.
Face with shame, ruddy; the oaf, he'd
Erred--he'd wiped his shirted tail.


*C[olon]

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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AFW - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
A real gasser..
alvin rhodes - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
elegant confusion...much like the tone of the OS
Johnny D - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
And THAT's an example of John Barry's mastery of syllable matching!
John Barry - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, AFW, Alvin, JD.
Larry Hensley - February 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Well written parody.

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