Sparky: Now, children, I want each of you to sing tall tales. I don't mind a little controversy. Just keep it clean.

Charlie: I have a very special dog, his age nobody knows,
He flew a plane in the Great War thru fire an wind and snow.
He captured the Red Baron and brought him home to tea,
The Baron learned to be civilized and one of us is he.

All: Sing round and round, let's sing, Charlie Brown.

Lucy: You call that a tall tale? I could do better.
Oh, I am such a wicked witch, I live inside a tree,
A goblin named Osama is living there with me.
We both grab little children and turn them into bees,
Their honey is a potion that brings grown ups to their knees.

All: Sing round and round, Let's sing, Charlie Brown.

Linus: Hey, Nudnik! You're supposed to be telling tall tales - not
your life story.
All: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
Lucy: OK, you blockhead! It's your turn and don't you dare sing
about the bloody Great Pumpkin.

Linus: I have a magic blanket, it banishes my woes,
It is my shining armor when I confront my foes.
It is my magic carpet, when 'round the world I stray,
But, most of all, it makes my crabby sister go away.

All: Sing round and round, let's sing, Charlie Brown.

Lucy: I ought to make you go away.

Snoopy: I have a tony penthouse on San Francisco Bay,
Where California's upper crust hears Schroder play.
Schroder: I've played Bach, Beethoven and Brahms, Mozart and the
rest,
And, best of all, my music soothes Lucy's crabby breast.
(But, I wish she'd stop being so pushy.)

All: Sing round and round, let's sing Charlie Brown.

Snoopy: Why can't I bark like a normal dog? Why must I quack like a
duck?!
Schroder: Uh, oh! Here comes that bad kid -

Bart: Oh, my best friend's a leprechaun, he throws up peanut
brittle,
And ev'ry time he picks his nose his boogers turn to skittles.
And when e'er he makes -
Sparky: That will do, you impertinant , vulgar young man! Go back to
your TV show.
Bart: Get bent!
All: Bleah! Yeeww! I'll never eat candy again.

Sparky: And he who tells a tale like that is such a crashing bore!