When it last ran
To my chagrin they towed it
But then I know it's blowin' smog

Rust in the springs
The rings have knocked since summer
Now I believe I'll have to jog


Damn...f*cking fan
Screeching loud
Much in need
Clutch is screwwwwwd

Cheap car 'o mine
This heap's never run too good

What will I find
When I peek under this hood?

So now I

Look at my plight
And start my Christmas wishin'
I'll need to get transmission tuned

Runnin' in spurts
Squirtin' oil 'till it smolders
I'll be parked on the shoulder soon

Worn
Tranny's torn
Screechin' loud
Know I need
Somethin' new

Cheap car 'o mine
(Light bulb snapped on where I stood!)

Sleek new design!
And more horses under hood

Go,,, go... go

{Musical interlude as I rip out engine and transmission and replace with my new, environmentally friendly innovation}

Fleet hamster drive
Damn, the wheels are spinnin' good

And I arrive
Quicker than I ever could

Fleet hamster drive

{fade as I drive off very slowly}