Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Fast Train to Darkville"

Original Song Title:

"Last Train to Clarksville"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Fast Train to Darkville"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

“Strangers on a Train” (1951)
Took the fast train to darkville,
Met a man with aberrations:
Thoughts are dark as well as dirty;
Causes Guy[1] much consternation.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
No, no, no, no!!

His name’s Bruno[2]; he’s not boring;
Wants to see his father dead.
He suggests they work together
In a lethal tête-à-tête.
And Guy says, “Whoa!
Whoa, whoa, Bruno!
No, no, BruNO!!
It’s quite clear that Bruno should be in a home.

It’s a bad brain, with dark-kill
Thoughts in muddled cogitation
And a misperception about Mrs.
Haines[3], waiting for separation
From her beau.
Bruno takes boat,
Garrotes her throat.

[sounds of strangulation]

It’s a bad brain that harks till
Guy will free him from the drone
Of his nosy old father, but Bruno’s station is:
And he’s laid low; the merry-go-round don’t go slow
He gives up the ghost, then Guy is free to roam.

[1]Haines, as played by Farley Granger (Phillip Morgan in “Rope”)
[2]Antony, as played by Robert Walker, a charming psycho, who meets Haines on a train and suggests the two swap murders: Bruno wants his father killed and offers to kill Haines’ estranged wife in return. Bruno goes through with his murder, but the great merrygoround-mandala turns.
[3]Miriam Haines, as played by Casey Rogers. Guy plans to leave her for Anne Morton (Ruth Roman), whose father is the ever present Leo G. Carroll, who has a colleague named Professor Collins, played by John B.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

MadameDeBlancville - March 25, 2011 - Report this comment
I prefer white meat, SirSweaty . . . blancville aHoy !

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 841