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Song Parodies -> "The Perfect Hubby"

Original Song Title:

"The Perfect Nanny"

Original Performer:

Mary Poppins Soundtrack

Parody Song Title:

"The Perfect Hubby"

Parody Written by:

Arwen

The Lyrics

So...I'm celebrating a birthday this week...bringing me to an age at which a girl should really stop playing around and think about settling down. A picky girl wants what a picky girl wants, though...so I thought I'd at least lay down a couple of requirements for those who are interested in the position...
[Spoken]
Wanted…a husband for one adorable elf…

[Sung]
If you want this choice position
To please me must be your mission
Please, no freaks
Love sports!
Please no
Short shorts!

To make me laugh you must be witty
On bad hair days, say I’m pretty
Deal with my pouting
And be sweet
You’re wrong?
Re-treat!

Treat me like I’m a jewel
When we meet say, “Holy Crap, YOU RULE!”
On your pillow never slobber
Pre-fer that you’re not A bank robber

If you work hard as the bread winner
I will only sometimes burn your dinner

Though you might be skeptical
Of what you see
I promise you now
There’s no one else like me
Hurry, Hubby!
Many thanks
Sincerely,

The Res-i-dent Elf

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   1
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 3   0
 1
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 4   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jeff Reuben - January 26, 2011 - Report this comment
I was ruled out at short-shorts, of course. Short and sweet, like you! You made me laugh several times :)
Old Man Ribber - January 26, 2011 - Report this comment
Arwen - Nicely done, funny, and as touchingly innocent as TOS. It's good to know you're still out there writing. ;D
DivaLaHubba - January 26, 2011 - Report this comment
Lady ARWEN, don't discount those muscular thighs displayed beneathe a Roman Toga ! . . . Hubba . . . Hubba !
Jeff Reuben - January 27, 2011 - Report this comment
A roman toga. Or an apron.
TJC - January 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Yer one clever elf--don't ever 'settle'! And, thanks for the artful reminder re that OS... I'd completely blanked!
UnKnownVo - January 29, 2011 - Report this comment
. . . there is something magical about 'that muscle' running along the inside of a Gent's Thigh, hmmm . . . . How I enjoy running my finger along it length . . .
Arwen - January 31, 2011 - Report this comment
Jeff...thank you. Don't rule yourself out just yet...you can sell those shorts. ; )

OMR...I am out here. Not writing as often as I should be, or as often as I wish. But I'm working on that. Thank you!

Diva...hahaha...I'll keep that mind!

TJC...glad you liked it. My inability to settle (or by some definitions, compromise at all) might be my downfall. Haha.

UKV...ok.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

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