Dippy young Rover...sussed he likes rolling...rolling around in shite
Gets in a tizzy...makes him feel dizzy...puppy fright, whines at night
An' his doo...it offends
The pong it can daze me...daughter's new fun pet...he is in pooper guise

Every day I look at him curled on my shin though
It's willy-nilly when humpin' time
Daughter's new fun pet's fine
(Daughter's new fun pet's fine)

Puppy's unruly...daughter threw tantrum...I wonder why they fight
An' she is so lazy...she won't look after...I calm his nerves at night
So he won't...feel afraid
As long as I praise him...daughter's new fun pet...he is in paradise

Every day I look at him curled on my shin though
The silly billy leaves drippin' slime
Daughter's new fun pet's fine
(Daughter's new fun pet's fine)

Biscuits an' choc'late...something not wise for...daughter's new chunder hound
But puppy's unruly...an' my girl's a giver...gives him them by the pound
On our love...he depends
The words that I've played with...daughter's new fun pet...they are a parody

Daughter's new fun pet's fine