-> "Spider-Man And Marijuana: Better Explanation"
Original Song Title:
"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious"
Parody Song Title:
"Spider-Man And Marijuana: Better Explanation"
The Lyrics
TOMMY TURTLE:
Dumb Klem Kadiddlehopper, klutz of a guy
Though he is Spider-Man, he can't catch a fly
Why:
Spider-Man loves Mari Juana; everybody knows it!
Face has such a vacant look it obviously shows it
If you doubt it, just observe how constantly he blows it
ALL:
Spider-Man loves Mari Juana; everybody knows it!
He tells a little whopper; white kind of lie
If he should come a cropper, now you know why!
NERD:
Poor Peter Parker played the part
Of picture-perfect dork [1]
He tripped and stumbled clumsily
At college and at work
Most folks assumed quite naturally
That Peter was a jerk
NERD, TOMMY TURTLE, AND CHORUS:
The honest explanation was
He had a secret quirk! Lurk!
Spider-Man loves Mari Juana; no, this isn't fiction!
Psycho-logic habit formed; it borders on addiction
Messes up his mind, this inescapable affliction
Almost turned his heroism into dereliction!
Not happy with his life as hero or nerd
Flight from reality is what he preferred
TOMMY TURTLE:
Denies that he is really hooked;
Refuses to admit;
At any time he wanted to,
He thinks that he could quit
NERD:
The Spider doesn't rea-
-lize how badly bug has bit [2]
He's come undone in web he spun [3]
He's trapped like any nit! [4]
NERD, TOMMY TURTLE, AND CHORUS:
Twit!
Aunt May's always telling him, "You don't look well a lot, son
"Wish that I could figure out this problem that you've got, son
"Hope it isn't HIV or other bug you've caught, son [2]
"Peter, please confide in me; please tell me what oh what, son!" [5]
Why can't a physics geek have high-paying job?
What turns his brain to mush; this genius, to slob?
TOMMY TURTLE:
You know, he talks all ass-backwards
Mumbles knowsitbodyeveryjuanamarimanlovesredips
This wack's going a bit too far,
Don't you think?
Indubitably!
Impairs his normal faculties
His mental sharpness, blunts
Can't hear!
He tried without success
To kick the habit twice or once
In spite of secret he bemoans
Still, evildoers: hunts
Um, your opinion?
Yes?
THE GIRLIE:
While he thinks it's a merry Jones [6]
I'd call him "cursed" and "dunce"! [7]
Oh, and a f***-up thing he is, too!
ALL:
Though...
He loves Mari Juana and so painfully he missed her
All that Peter ever did was treat her like a sister
Wonder how for all those years he managed to resist her?
Till the end of version two when finally he kissed her!
I predict that very soon they'll be "Mrs." and "Mr."!
[1] "Picture-perfect" = Peter was a photographer.
[2] Spiders catch bugs.
[3] Trapped in his own self-inflicted "web".
[4] "Nit" = egg or infant of a parasitic insect, as might be caught in a spiderweb.
[5] (what, oh) "what, son" = "Watson" (Mary Jane Watson, Peter's heartthrob).
[6] "merry Jones" = Mary Jane.
[7] "cursed and dunce" = Kirsten Dunst, who played Mary Jane Watson.
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 5.0 | |
How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
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Total Votes: | 4 |
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