Ooga, ugga, ooga, ugga
Stop! Stop the music! Get rid of those stupid back ups. Nobody sings like that - especially Indians! Now, let's take it from the top.

In the little town of Springfield
Lives Apu, an Indian chap
He works at the Kwik -E Market
Where people go to shop
Hindu Apu was a bachelor
Was as content as he could be
All the ladies would go to see him
And buy their groceries.

Apu worked at the Kwik - E
His charm made him a success
Apu loved all the ladies
That was good for his business.

He sold tickets for the lottery
Homer Simpson came in each day
Bought pink doughnuts with lots of sprinkles
But no luck would come his way
Then Apu received a letter
With a lotus flower inside
It was a notice from his mother
She had just found him a bride.

Apu worked at the Kwik - E
He was as content as he could be
Then Apu was betrothed to Minjula
What was his destiny?

Apu's mom arrived in Springfield
And Minjula was in tow
The time had come for their wedding
'Cause his momma told him so
So they wed in Indian fashion
With floats and flowers and elephants
Now they're cleaning up manure
At the Simpson residence.

Apu wed Minjula
It was meant to be at the start
Now Apu and Minjula
Work at the Kwik - E Mart.