One team's payroll's larger
and one team's payroll's small
and the ones that A-Rod plays for
don't go anywhere at all.
Go ask Alex... feeling two feet small!

And if you go chasing habits
that are so bad after all
like Giambi who once had muscles
and now he can't hit the ball
go ask Alex... to answer the call.

When the men on the bases
are stranded and they can't go
and you just had some kind of beverage
and the taps cut off their flow
go ask Alex... the Sham-bino!

When Giambi makes excuses
and Brown's hand is bathed in red
and this white knight's swinging backwards
and the turtleneck shakes his head
remember... what the Mad Dog said:
"Yanks are dead!"
"Yanks are dead!"